


the map that leads to you

by svncity



Category: Start-Up (Korea TV), StartUp (TV)
Genre: F/M, Lots of Crying, Startup, Team jipyeong, ceciverse, ceciverse comeback, curing where it hurts once again, fck dosan, going thru a jidal crisis, han ji pyeong - Freeform, here we go again, im sorry in advance, jidal, lots of yearning too cause im nice, phr chose violence but i chose worst, seo dalmi - Freeform, team goodboy, the kdrama end sucked but im here to make it better, the one percent chance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:14:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 27,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28430730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/svncity/pseuds/svncity
Summary: A tragic car accident forces Ji-pyeong to live with the Seo family, but this event's aftermath can permanently damage his relationship with Dal-mi.As the wounds are still open and broken hearts mark every step, will they be able to find their way back to each other?(inspired in the song Maps by Maroon 5)
Relationships: Han Ji Pyeong/Nam Do San/Seo Dal Mi, Han Ji Pyeong/Seo Dal Mi
Comments: 77
Kudos: 200





	1. I like to think that we had it all

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jidalers and folks at ceciverse on twt](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=jidalers+and+folks+at+ceciverse+on+twt).



> here am i again ready to make yall suffer because we cant get over jidal even if 2021 is right at the corner lmao 
> 
> hope you guys like this story and the drama i decided to add to this alternative ending 
> 
> have a nice reading and i see you at the end of the chapter!

_(listen to[this playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/78wSZnFAFG877FQhuaE625?si=h0Ft--QqSde1PeuY4So1Fw#_=_) to feel more pain while reading the chapter)_

**xx**

Ji-pyeong could see the finishing line getting farther away from him on the horizon.

So he decided to yield.

He held the steering wheel with more strength than necessary, having parked his car because he couldn’t phantom to drive in such a pained state. Feeling his chest constricted and finding air hard to breathe, Ji-pyeong decided it was enough. 

_It’s okay, this is enough_ , he thought while staring at the plant and the letterbox with glassy eyes. 

And it was.

It was enough because he had come this far. 

It was enough because he hadn’t lost himself in the process.

In fact, Ji-pyeong felt like he learned a valuable lesson from eighteen years of this heartbreaking journey. He found out he could love someone, the wholeheartedly and brazing love some people only dream of encountering in their life. 

Despite not knowing if he could be ever loved back, it was enough for him to feel such a boundless and thrilling emotion. 

Even if he ended up with only his memories at the end. Even if letters from a person that didn’t exist anymore and a tree was his consolation prize. 

At least he had loved someone, and this no one could steal from him. 

After all, no hands are capable of erasing one’s feelings. 

**xx**

Dal-mi held a single worn purple paper in her hand while standing in a room full of color. 

For some reason, she felt like this could be the perfect metaphor for her life. Dal-mi, too, felt like a worn-out color standing between bright tones, and yet, she couldn’t manage to understand this feeling properly. 

Written in a sharpie with Do-san’s handwriting, she read his reason for starting a start-up and just froze in place as the words caved-in. 

_“I want to turn a misunderstanding into reality.”_

A simple phrase that seemed to dig the last nail on Dal-mi’s coffin. Such a mundane sentence that made her remember that it was all a lie from the beginning.

A lie, a free choice made by two men. A choice they stole from her with no rights, not a misunderstanding. 

“Does this mean…” Dal-mi began to say, trying to make him assume his mistakes for once. 

“Dal-mi…” Do-san interrupted in a pained voice, “Why do you like me?” He asked, almost begging now. 

Dal-mi couldn’t answer this. Not because it was the third time he questioned her feelings, but simply because she didn’t have an answer. Right now, words were escaping her troubled mind as she realized what had happened from the start. 

“I’m not your first love, and I didn’t write those letters.” Do-san kept going, intending to explain himself but actually listing the reasons why Dal-mi shouldn’t answer at all “I lied to you and hurt you. I can’t think of a single reason why you’d like me.” He finished saying, despair darkening his kind pupils. 

And she couldn’t either. 

Dal-mi didn’t know much about love, having loved a fantasy of a boy most of her life. However, she knew it wasn’t supposed to be this hard. 

When she thought about the love her parents felt for a time in the past, Dal-mi remembered them coexisting together without listing reasons to choose the other one, without lies standing between them. 

Despite their divorce and everything that came after, her parents would always be her first love reference. Because Dal-mi knew love in her father and Haelmoni’s form, she could never call what was troubling her heart with this holy name. 

It was contentment. She was simply settling down with the easy option, the safest one. 

Choosing Do-san was all about taking what was being offered, a shiny cheap thing dangling in front of her face for months now. 

Choosing Do-san and their relationship meant losing herself, betraying this primal part of her who would always prefer hardship and its lessons. 

“Why do you like me?” Do-san tried once again, his words squeezing Dal-mi’s heart in the process. 

“I…” She started, trying hard to find an answer inside herself, “I…” Dal-mi breathed out heavily, failing to control the scorching pain in her chest.

“Yes?” Do-san asked when she went silent while staring at his eyes.

“I can’t do this, Do-san.” said the CEO, simply and openly, feeling lighter by the confession. 

“What?” 

“We can’t do this, Do-san. Don’t you see that we are built on lies and deceiving? We don’t even know each other to call this love someday.” Dal-mi announced hands on her chest and a hurt yet sincere expression on her face. 

“I’m willing to try. What about you?” He fired back, the accusing tone turning him into the ugly, angry boy she saw a few times in the past. 

“This won’t work out, Do-san. You know this just as I do. You just listed the reasons our feelings could never be real.” 

“I did it so you could see as I do that we can overcome our past and build a different path, Dal-mi.” Do-san explained, angry and hurt with her sudden rejection. 

“Well, we can’t do it.” She answered plainly, adopting a high tone Dal-mi had never used in this life. “I can’t.” She finished, tears smudging her sight by the second now. 

“Dal-mi…” The developer tried again, taking a step closer to her.

“Please, don’t.” Dal-mi pleaded, stopping him with a raised hand and an instinctive step backwards. “Let’s not do this so we can work peacefully together, okay?”

“We need to have this conversation.”

“Right now, I need to talk with Ms. Yoon about the Smart City project since we decided to do it.” Dal-mi explained, raising the worn paper with a cheap laugh. “If you want to have this conversation, will you please respect my wishes and give me some time to process everything?” She requested in a low and tired tone. 

“Do we even stand a chance?” He asked, holding her forearm softly when she turned to go. 

“Please, don’t wait for me.” Dal-mi said honestly, raising on her toes to kiss his cheek before leaving for the meeting. 

As she watched the elevator doors closing and taking Do-san out of view, Dal-mi thought about what they could’ve been if her feelings were different. 

Most of all, she thought about what she would be. 

**xx**

Ji-pyeong couldn’t pinpoint when he started to cry openly in his car. 

Maybe it was the sad music or the light rain outside the window. Still, suddenly the pain in his chest became this overwhelming burden, an all-consuming feeling able to dry heavy tears from him. The city became a blur of flaming emotions at once, a gigantic smudge created by his unfocused and overflowing eyes.

When the pain mingled with a wave of frightful anger, Ji-pyeong decided to hit the accelerator at maximum speed. 

He was tired of being the brake, the sandbox, a safe place for everyone around him, except for himself. 

Ji-pyeong was the penpal and the son someone never had in the past. At the beginning of his career, he was the angel investor and then the mentor to a bunch of naive young adults trying to start this life as if it was a game. 

And yet, he ended up alone. 

Every time, every damn night, was spent by himself, only memories and the dream of a future being his companion. 

Once again, he was all alone. However, the pain of losing what could have been was a nightmare, like a knife being twisted on his heart at every move, every breath. 

Driven by his sadness and despair, Ji-pyeong chose to be inconsequent for once and sail off without a map. Everyone else seemed to be having a blast from this stupid experience, so why couldn’t he do it too?

In reality, and deep in his heart, he used to think that Dal-mi was the map for a deserved happy ending. Ji-pyeong knew now how foolish it was to dream of owning happiness in a life full of sorrow and abandonment. 

She decided to take a different path, so it was time to retrace his own. And he would start at this second, taking different turns at the road and exploring the pained possibilities he had in hands. 

When a truck’s light coming fast on his way showed up at the highway, Ji-pyeong kept both hands pressuring the steering wheel and eyes focused ahead. Surpassing the vehicle riding in the wrong-way was the new mission his brain had founded to overcome everything. 

If he managed to safely end this trip, then maybe this sailing off without a map thing was indeed possible. Even for a forever lost boy like him. 

Unexpectedly, the car started to skid on the wet road, and Ji-pyeong sensed the car suspension steering at its own force. When the tires screeched on the pavement, making an acute sound competing only with the truck’s loud horn, the man’s brain kicked in and took control of the situation. 

His hands pressured the steering wheel in an effort to keep control. Ji-pyeong tried to realign the vehicle to escape the speeding truck with every ounce of lasting strength available. Forcing the convertible towards the coasting, Ji-pyeong breathed in a few seconds of relief for having managed to escape.

However, it was too late. 

When the truck’s front collided with the backside of his car, Ji-pyeong held his breath and held to himself before the convertible started to spin rapidly on the road. 

Suddenly, everything was upside down. Ji-pyeong knew the vehicle was repeatedly overturning, and there was nothing else to do but let go, so he did it. 

For the first, and maybe the last time ever. 

There was no gravity, no sky, nor ground. There was no balance, just a dizzy feeling of defying every nature rule as he and his car flew through the road. 

No boundary and limits held Ji-pyeong’s body, only the feeling of the seat belt cutting through his neck, pressuring his chest until he started to black-out. 

When the glass shreds from the windows started to create paper cuts all over his skin, his brain processed what this was. 

Death.

An end. 

His last seconds on Earth. 

They say some people see their whole life in seconds during a deathly experience. Others might freeze and think of nothing as a self-defense strategy to cope with what it’s happening. 

But as Ji-pyeong saw the money-tree plant breaking into pieces and the letters spreading around him like cherry blossoms petals on spring’s last day, all he could think about was Dal-mi. 

What they could’ve been and what they would now never be able to become. 

About a promise of a future he dreamed of ever since that forsaken day on Sandbox when a quick-witted girl confronted her CEO sister during an event. 

When the one person who made his heart race during his teenagehood showed up again in his life and made a beautiful mess. 

On the next second, darkness hugged him like the loving mother Ji-pyeong never had. Slowly and progressively, he felt like his body was diving into the starless night’s sky. 

Despite seeing everything in blood red and fire orange tones, the man didn’t feel pain, neither heat nor cold. He felt nothing. 

Maybe some deity had pitied him in his last seconds and decided to take all the pain away. 

Maybe this was death, after all. 

Ji-pyeong turned his head to stare at the colorful envelopes laying out around him with glassy eyes. Now, they were all turning into memories as blood and rain washed their contents away, every word and wholehearted feeling written on them. 

He tried to breathe but choked. 

Once. 

Twice. 

Ji-pyeong tried to breathe once again, foolishly believing that air could be his savior and he would survive. Exactly like he did all these years: by himself. 

But then, there was nothing.

**xx**


	2. we drew a map to a better place, but on that road I took a fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a tense chapter, so let's go straight to the story and i see you at the end

**xx**

Dal-mi tried hard to balance the iced coffees on her hands before finding the courage to go inside SH Venture Capital's office.

Right now, she felt stupid. 

How idiotic of her to think that such a simple drink could mend her troubled relationship with Ji-pyeong. 

And yet, she had to try. 

Dal-mi had to do it so they could go back to how things were during Chuseok. Back then, they started to feel like a family, playing with one another, and spending the night having meaningful and needed conversations about life. 

Once again, she felt lost, and Ji-pyeong seemed to be her white knight, ready to help her through difficult times. 

However, she knew that Do-san showing up had messed up their development, and now she had to run after making it better again. Maybe cold coffee could be the right way to take the first step on this. 

Breathing in and out to regain control of her mind and body, Dal-mi opened a bright smile and joyfully entered the space. Hair knotted in her signature ponytail and dressed comfortably in a white button-up shirt, she looked like a CEO, not a woman who was ugly crying in the bathroom just a few minutes ago.

Before she could say a word, eyes searching for Ji-pyeong in the room, Dong-Chun got up from his chair suddenly. Trembling hands holding the phone and a pale expression on his face, the manager looked at Ms. Yoon with teary eyes. 

"What happened, Mr. Park?" The woman asked, already concerned and feeling her chest contracting with fear. 

"It's Mr. Han…" He started to say in a weak tone. 

"What happened?" Dal-mi questioned, crossing the room in long steps and coming closer to understand what was going on. 

"He… I..." Dong-Chun began to explain, tears coming down at his eyes as Dal-mi felt fear freezing her entire being. 

"Tell me!" She said louder, startling the man in front of her.

"Mr. Han was involved in a serious accident on the highway, there's a nurse on the scene and she called saying... He isn't breathing nor responding to first aid efforts." Dong-Chun spilled out before falling on his chair in shock. 

"What?" Dal-mi screamed, letting the coffee fall on the floor as her whole body started to tremble in despair. 

As the information settled in her heart, Dal-mi felt a familiar pain, the same scorching one that had taken over her when she learned about her father's fate. 

Once again, she felt like a loved-one was being taken away from her. 

And just like in the past, she could do nothing about it. 

**xx**

Dal-mi couldn't remember anything from the journey to the accident's spot on a famous highway close to Sandbox. 

Aghast from the information Dong-Chun received on the phone, Dal-mi only wasted a few seconds before running towards the garage to pick up her car. Her trembling hands couldn't even open it, so it felt like a heavenly blessing when In-jae showed up in a hurry and stole the keys from her younger sister. 

"What do you think you are doing?" She questioned in a cutting tone, looking disturbed and pale with everything that was happening. 

"Ji-pyeong was in a car accident, and I need to…" Dal-mi started, tears mingling with her shaky voice as she tried to take the keys back.

"Well, you can't drive like this if we want to avoid a second accident." The older sister answered, opening the car doors in a hurry. 

"How can you be like this during such a troubling situation, In-jae?" Dal-mi screamed, exasperated as her sister entered the car. 

"Sarcasm is my defense mechanism. You should find yours before you break apart and make everything worse." She fired back, angrily starting the car. "Get the fuck in, Dal-mi. We have to go!" 

Dal-mi was unable to remember the last time she and In-jae shared a car, but this was an urgent situation, so abnormal measures were needed. Hoping up in the passenger's seat, the younger CEO didn't even tie her seat belt before In-jae speeded-out of the garage and into early morning's light traffic. 

They drove in silence for long minutes, In-jae looking agitated out of her mind while Dal-mi felt numb by her own thoughts. 

Was he alive? Was he breathing as they flew through traffic to reach the accident place? 

Would he be okay even after an aggressive accident? Would he recover? 

Did he feel pain? 

Had he felt loneliness before blacking out? 

"Stop right now, Seo Dal-mi." In-jae exclaimed out of the blue, making her sister jump on the seat, startled by the harsh tone. "Don't go down this path right now. Focus on getting there first and freak out only when Ji-pyeong is in the hospital's hands." 

"Ji-pyeong?" Dal-mi questioned, feeling uneasy with the unknown intimacy her sister had with Mr. Han and tasting his name on her tongue for the first time. "Were you guys friends or something?" 

"We were… something." In-jae answered, failing to find the right words as her mind was going blank out of fear by the second.

"We have known each other for a long time now, and before I dropped Morning Group, we worked together on a few opportunities." She explained in a severe tone, indicating that now was not the time to question this. 

"But…" 

Before Dal-mi could form a comprehensible sentence, the sisters heard sirens coming fast behind them and saw many cars roughly parked in the road's coasting. As the car drove forward slowly, the atmosphere turned into an unbearable presence, coated by fear and despair. 

They had entered the accident zone, and such a small drop of the whole scenario was enough to steal air from Dal-mi's lungs in a second. 

In a blast, she jumped from the steady vehicle and crossed the space to where people seemed to be gathering. Dal-mi went through a bunch of strangers exclaiming in shocked tones and crying tears of sorrow for a man they didn't even know in the first place. 

As her eyes zeroed on the scene, Dal-mi felt her knees weakening and a scream being repressed by her shrinking chest. 

Utter destruction. Overpowering desolation. 

This was the scenario ahead of the black and yellow strip containing people from coming closer.

What was left of Ji-pyeong's convertible looked only like a car skeleton's, having been thrashed during the rollover the vehicle took after colliding with the speeding truck. The central part stood a few meters away from where Dal-mi was looking, turned upside down outside the road's limit and entirely smashed, more a cage than a car now. 

Shreds of glass and metal chunks were spread everywhere, like snowflakes on the ground during winter's first snowfall. Small fires distributed around the space were being contained by the firefighter's crew, and yet the smell of burning tires and gasoline was an overwhelming presence. 

As the blood was. 

Smeared as traces on a map, the blood led to where the convertible stood overturned, indicating a distressing final destination. Even following the path with her eyes made Dal-mi feel like her heart was being ripped from the chest. 

She knew that seeing where the car had stopped meant looking at Ji-pyeong. 

When her body started moving at its own will, making Dal-mi trespass the strip and fight every damned cop trying to make her stop, she tried to shut off her mind completely. However, as the letters she once wrote appeared as falling leaves in a once spirituous tree, she thoroughly lost control. 

Running down the slope to where the convertible had stopped, Dal-mi started to hyperventilate as her feet stepped on Ji-pyeong's blood and fragments from the money tree she once gave to Do-san. 

How could she have been so clueless to not even know the man had taken care of this stupid plant after everything that happened? 

How mindful could a person be to end up in this situation?

Dal-mi felt like she had lost it all at once, as if someone had taken it away from her before she could realize who Ji-pyeong was. 

When strong arms encircled her waist to avoid her from going closer to the vehicle, Dal-mi started to scream desperately. Nailing the officer's arm and drying blood in the process, she only wished to reach the car and hold Ji-pyeong closer to her dying heart. 

"Ma'am, I need to stop now!" The policeman screamed while dragging the woman away from the crime scene. 

"Let me go." She kept yelling and trying to escape, eyes focused on all the destruction around the convertible. 

"He is in the ambulance now, there is nobody down there." Another person explained loudly before Dal-mi froze in place. 

Fighting away from the officer's embrace, Dal-mi kicked and squirmed until she was able to run into the ambulance. Before she could hop on, a traumatologist stopped her motion with a blooded glove and arm, looking dead serious behind the medical mask. 

"Identify yourself, lady. You can't go bossing around an accident scene." A grave voice said, using a tone that showed she was used to dealing with frantic women and grave accidents. "Are you from his family?" She asked, annoyed by the delay the medical team was already dealing with.

"He has no one, okay?" Dal-mi exclaimed, frustrated and miserable by saying this out loud. "Listen, I'm the only family he has." She explained, trying to calm herself to avoid getting into a fight with the rescuer. 

The older woman looked straight into Dal-mi's soul. Working as a traumatologist for more than two decades now, the doctor recognized a troubled loved-one from afar. 

The woman outside the ambulance seemed to be too close to losing it once again. Even if she didn't see it now, Dal-mi was a loved-one for Ji-pyeong, maybe even a loving one. 

Swallowing down her annoyance by the stranger's breakdown, the traumatologist only offered her clean hand so Dal-mi could get in. 

And if the doctor wasn't holding her, Dal-mi might have fainted horribly when she saw Ji-pyeong inside the ambulance. 

Nothing could have prepared her weak mind to process his current state. 

Layed down on a stretcher, tubes coming out from everywhere turned his muscular form into an unrecognizable mess. Patched up like a rag doll, his skin was pale and sweaty, as if life was being drawn from him by the second. 

Ji-pyeong was a pile of loose limbs and rickety members. Long gone was his former glory and shine. 

As she stared at him, Dal-mi could only see the broken boy he said he was in the letters, a realization that was too frightening for her. 

A messy mass of blooded gauze and cotton stood to his side on the ambulance, betraying how fraught the situation was. Devices connected to his body made beeping sounds, a symphony of impersonality and coldness. 

Another traumatologist, a man this time, stood around him, checking his vitals every two seconds. Despite his professionalism, the doctor touched Ji-pyeong's frail body in a way Dal-mi knew he would hate. 

"Please, be gentle." She dropped out of nowhere, letting the female traumatologist go and falling down on the seat next to Ji-pyeong, too shocked to even touch him. 

"Ma'am, there's no way to be gentle when he is dying." answered the doctor, in a grave and irritated tone. 

"We need to go, right now." said the first traumatologist, the one who helped Dal-mi entering the ambulance. "You should hold his hand. Some people say that touch is a powerful healing tool." She explained to the desolated woman in a soft tone, trying to make her come out from the catharsis she dived into. 

As the doctors continued to work around Ji-pyeong, patching up his smaller bruises and identifying internal ones, Dal-mi stood still. Frozen, actually. 

She was so damn scared to touch him. 

Dal-mi felt that he could break from a single touch from hers, and yet the doctors handled him roughly as they tried to give him more time. Once again, she was cowering from him in a moment he most needed company. 

Holding her breath, Dal-mi took his hands between hers, as if testing the waters of how such an intimate act would feel. 

Love could come in many shapes and gestures, but Dal-mi would always think that holding hands was the ultimate sign of comfort and adoration. There was something utterly intimate from a person who kept your hands on hers constantly, kissing its palm and keeping it warm during winter nights. 

She never had someone to do this, but neither did Ji-pyeong. 

Could they maybe be this person for each other? 

Despite her expectations, Ji-pyeong's hands were dead cold. As much as she tried to warm it up, blowing hot air in his fingers and keeping it between her own palms, it wasn't enough. 

Dal-mi looked desperate to the outsider's eyes, and maybe she was losing her mind as her brain processed that Ji-pyeong might not make it through another day. 

Feeling his coldness and how damp was his once dazzling skin, the prominent CEO realized that life could still take more from her. 

As if her father and her entire family weren't enough. Dal-mi could lose the one that had just started to resemble family as well. 

Holding his hands like she held a precious stone, Dal-mi closed her eyes and prayed. 

For the first time in her life, she prayed honestly and open-heartedly to any deity who could hear her. The woman did not care if a devilish one would listen because at the moment, she was in complete despair, and trying to bargain for Ji-pyeong's life was the least she could do. 

She wasn't there with him. For him. 

They drifted apart so quickly from one another, and Dal-mi couldn't put the effort to reach him before Ji-pyeong retreated to his old shell. And look at what that had cost him. 

Cost her, as well. 

As she called every possible name and begged for some nature's force to save this golden boy with a broken heart and a beautiful soul, Dal-mi understood what this gnawing sensation eating her insides was. 

It was care. 

She cared deeply for him, and realizing it only now made Dal-mi feel utterly stupid. How could she have been so blind? 

Ji-pyeong had cared for her during all these years, doing small things like protecting her head while she entered the car and even traveling miles just to pick her up. He was always there, at her corner, making sure she was safe, comfortable, and taken care of. 

And all Dal-mi did was treat him coldly. 

Before the first tears came up at her eyes again, the machine monitoring his vitals went frantic. Suddenly, the ambulance was filled with this acute and agonizing sound. 

Both doctors jumped over Ji-pyeong, pushing Dal-mi on the seat, so they had space to handle the situation. His heartbeats went up too fast and were now tumbling down as domino pieces. 

He was having a seizure. 

In front of Dal-mi's eyes. 

"What is going on?" She screamed, coming closer from the doctors and looking deranged again. 

"Fuck, he is bleeding again." Said the male traumatologist, going to a bandage on Ji-pyeong's side and pressuring the wound. 

"Let the girl do it. We need to tone this down before his brain collapses." Exclaimed the other doctor, looking to Dal-mi with fire in her eyes. 

"You need to pressure this down if you want your friend to survive, okay? Put pressure on this with your both hands." He explained, a severe and harsh tone hardening his intense expressions. 

Dal-mi couldn't react because, in the next second, the male doctor pulled her closer and positioned her hands over Ji-pyeong's overflowing injury. Acting out of instinct, she kept pressuring it while looking at them working around them both. 

When her hands heated from the blood coming from his deep cut, Dal-mi's mind went blank as her entire being stiffened. As the metallic smell was registered by her senses, the woman started to cry openly and fearfully. 

Ji-pyeong's blood was soaking her hands, turning the once white sleeve of her social shirt into a mess, like a clean canvas being stained with dark red tones. She was now using her whole body weight to control the bleeding, but it was flowing non-stop, and his body seemed to be shutting down from this. 

"We're here." Announced the driver, opening the doors in a rush as a medical team appeared to take Ji-pyeong out. 

The thing is, Dal-mi couldn't deal with hospitals. Not after what happened with her father. 

Every time she listened to sirens or the harsh sound of tires from a car braking sharply, Dal-mi would feel this overwhelming wave of anxiety freezing her in place. Having been inside an ambulance and dealing with Ji-pyeong's transportation was already too much. 

However, seeing him being taken away by a stranger's cold hands was even worse. Once again, she felt useless and frightened about what could happen to him. 

"It's okay, love. Breathe with me." said a gentle woman dressed as a nurse, coming up inside the ambulance and holding Dal-mi's by the shoulders. 

She couldn't breathe. Every inhale was like shreds of glass being swallowed down her throat, opening thousands of paper cuts inside her lungs and chest. 

Dal-mi felt feverish and dizzy all at once. Heart racing to a maximum level and blood pressure plummeting, she tried to calm herself, taking a hand to her face just to block what was happening. 

But seeing Ji-pyeong's blood all over her was way worse. 

So she tried to activate this survival mode inside every human being. Dal-mi held her breath for a few seconds, forcing her heart to skip a beat and start working correctly again. 

Thanking the kind nurse, she jumped from the ambulance and sped into the hospital. Compressing every ounce of fear and despair from seeing the white stainless walls, Dal-mi went straight to the emergency reception to talk with anyone who could help her. 

"Where is he?" She asked in a hurry, ignoring that they might have had thousands of patients coming up today. 

"He went straight to surgery, and you now need to wait." Explained the same nurse who helped her a while ago, a tag saying Nam Joo-ri attached to her pastel pink uniform. 

Dal-mi looked around and tried to recognize the plaque's name, forcing her brain to process through the trauma's fog as she saw a bunch of arrows indicating different places. When she read "surgery rooms" in one of them, the woman didn't wait another second before running towards them. 

Only to be held, again, by strong hands keeping her in place. As she screamed and kicked and fought, someone came over and slapped her face. Hard as a stone. 

"Control yourself, right now." Haelmoni's stern tone came up as Dal-mi looked aside in shock. "This is not about you, Seo Dal-mi, so behave yourself." 

"Ha-Haelmoni." Dal-mi cried out, falling in the woman's arm and breathing openly for the first time since leaving Sandbox earlier today. "I am sorry. I am so so sorry." she exclaimed as her grandmother patted her back caringly. 

"It's okay, my dear. It's not your fault." Haelmoni answered through heavy tears coming down as well. "Right now, we need to help the kind doctors saving Good Boy, okay?" She explained, holding Dal-mi's face between her trembling hands. 

Haelmoni looked extremely troubled, just like Dal-mi. Her once warm eyes were now cold and startled from fear, mouth in a tense line, and skin bleached by distress. 

She was in pain because it felt like losing a child all over again. When Choi Won-deok lost her only son years ago, a part of who she was went away with him, and it never returned. 

Losing her kid meant losing herself as well. 

However, having reconnected with Ji-pyeong after all these years woke up a whole new part of her soul, as if waiting for him to come back. 

Right now, the older woman didn't think she could make it with this kind of pain again. 

"What should I do?" Dal-mi asked, swallowing her tears and trying to recompose herself

"You will do as the nurses tell you so while I talk with the doctors." Haelmoni explained, getting up from the floor and raising Dal-mi with her, "Go to the bathroom first and wash yourself. I promise to keep you posted." 

Looking at her grandmother's lovingly, yet frail, smile was enough to make her obey. Dal-mi went to the bathroom first and stood for long minutes, raising her hands to take the drying blood out. 

Between tears and suppressed sobs, Dal-mi cleaned her body and changed into a new shirt. However, nothing in this world could erase what it felt to see Ji-pyeong almost dying. 

The scars this experience left would permanently be tattooed on her heart and soul. 

"I need you to fill in some information for us, ma'am." explained the nurse, giving her a clipboard holding a form and a cup of green tea as well. "This will calm your heart." Joo-ri said with a warm smile. 

Thanking her with a weak nod, Dal-mi proceeded to answer the form. 

Filling the first page was easy. She only had to give information about who she was, considering she accompanied Ji-pyeong to the hospital. Dal-mi filled the blank spaces with quivering hands at a slow pace but froze where she should write what her relationship with him was. 

They were nothing. Not even friends, neither family, no matter how much Dal-mi felt like it. 

Watching the blank space, Dal-mi realized they never discussed the letters and their relationship. They just fell in a comfortable zone, a rhythm where the letters and their past didn't seem to exist. 

Of course, Dal-mi had eaten up the opportunity to escape a real talk. Running away from any ounce of pay seemed to be working fine, considering where she stood now.

God, she was such a coward.

And this was her opportunity to make it right. 

Dal-mi wrote that she was his wife without thinking twice. At least this way, she could keep visiting without being held back again. 

Holding her breath, she handed the first form to the friendly nurse and took the other one. Looking sideways to check on Joo-ri's reaction, Dal-mi pretended to be enthralled with the blank paper. 

"Oh, so your name is Han Dal-mi?" Joo-ri asked as she read her answers. "Should I add this name to your visitor's tag?" 

"I…" Dal-mi tried to say, choking on her own words. "Yes I am. Please proceed to do so." She explained, coughing through her discomfort and trying to pose as his wife with more certainty. 

Thinking about this situation would be her problem tomorrow. Right now, she was more concerned with filling in the missing information about Ji-pyeong, such as parent's name, blood type, and stuff she had no idea of. 

Writing down his birthday was easy enough, this being the only thing she could remember knowing from him. He was born on May 7th, a day Dal-mi thought was related to Do-san, but that, in reality, said a lot about Ji-pyeong. 

Remembering the day they spent playing Go-To in his apartment would always make her smile, despite the lies involved in that scenario. Dal-mi had a good time, and it was the first time she saw Ji-pyeong as a person, not the angel investor or the frightful manager. 

What she wouldn't give to see him like this again. 

Before Dal-mi could tap the pen in the paper for the millionth time, Haelmoni showed up and stole the form from her. Picking up another pen from the nurse's balcony, the older woman proceeded to fill the spaces rapidly and knowingly. 

Seeing her do it only made Dal-mi remember how much Haelmoni and Ji-pyeong were close and how she failed to notice this as well. 

"What now?" Dal-mi asked after placing the tag on her blouse, staring at her grandmother while waiting for another order. 

"Han Dal-mi?" Haelmoni asked, an eyebrow up as she experienced saying this name out loud. 

"Don't ask. I will explain later." Her granddaughter answered, lying openly as she looked away shily. "What do we do now, Haelmoni?" 

"Now we wait." She answered, holding Dal-mi's hands while both looked to the doors, waiting for the doctor to come out anytime. 

Ji-pyeong was in experienced hands now, but most of all, he was being held by fate. 

More than waiting, everything the women could do was hope for the best. 

Hope for him to wake up. 

**xx**

It turned out that waiting was not Dal-mi's specialty in this life. 

Almost an entire month had passed from Ji-pyeong's surgery, and they were yet to see a reaction from the comatose man. After three different operations and a truckload of medicines to stabilize his situation, the doctors sent him to a hospital room. 

Relocating him to a comfortable space was a decision made so the doctors could keep an eye on him while allowing his body to heal independently. Having taken out any breathing mechanism, Ji-pyeong was free to heal at his own time. 

"They had done everything in their power", Joo-ri explained. 

"Every doctor and surgeon went through his case", said the female traumatologist who took care of him. 

"His prognosis was good, but it was up to his body", another specialist affirmed with a positive tone.

However, Dal-mi and Haelmoni kept waiting religiously for a reaction. And got nothing but the beeping sound of the machines maintaining him alive. 

Dal-mi got over her hospital fear by spending every available hour on Ji-pyeong's side. She was now familiar with every nurse and staff working with him, being respected as his wife and not the distant friend she was. 

When her friends visited, Dal-mi made sure to hide the tag and play coy about the whole thing. Surviving Sa-ha interrogations were not easy, but at least her grandmother had defended the woman from any intrusive question. 

Even Do-san showed up a few times, but it was always too awkward to talk with him while Ji-pyeong stood caged in a bed, serum tubes and devices all around him. 

His short and rare visits would ever happen during Dal-mi's breaks. They would share a cup of coffee and mostly discuss work before he left for Sandbox. 

Always sitting at a considerable distance and never looking at each other thoroughly in the eyes. 

Watching him leave made Dal-mi feel at ease again. An ugly sensation to have towards your almost-boyfriend, one she would look into in the distant future. 

So after a few days, Dal-mi fell into a routine with Ji-pyeong. 

She would always work and study in his room, making sure to talk with him in the process so Ji-pyeong could get better soon. At night, Dal-mi would read all types of books and magazines for him, stealing the newspaper from the waiting room sometimes for him to be updated on what was happening in the world. 

Dal-mi had decorated his room with flowers and other cozy elements so he could feel loved and taken care of. Knowing his daily schedule for medicines and appointments, she made sure to be by his side during every possible moment. 

Sometimes, she would wake up after falling asleep at his side. 

Other times, she would find herself looking at the name tag through the mirror and thinking about what being Ji-pyeong's wife could mean. Being his best friend, companion, and loved-one. 

Being his, and only his. 

For some reason, Han Dal-mi felt right. A name she got used to being called after weeks inside the hospital, making her thoughts about it come easier and less repressed. 

Haelmoni and In-jae would sometimes hop in her routine, making company to Ji-pyeong and talking about their days. Most of all, they went to check on Dal-mi, leaving clothes and work so she could distract her mind a little. 

As Dal-mi got thinner, living on a diet based mostly on hospital food, her grandmother felt afraid she would get sick. Because her granddaughter refused to go home for more than one night, Haelmoni made sure to take loads of homemade meals for her to eat correctly. 

The older woman couldn't understand why Dal-mi was going through this hardship for a man she didn't have any close relation with, but something inside her being told her to let it be. Maybe it was guilt, maybe it was care. 

And wasn't care the seed of love? 

**xx**

Dal-mi couldn't see Ji-pyeong dressed in hospital clothes for another second. 

They were close to completing a whole month in that room and seeing him using a bland wardrobe every day was making her lose her mind. Ji-pyeong would always be dressed nicely, using expensive suits and flawless shirts, so waking up in a horrid outfit was unacceptable. 

Maybe Dal-mi's brain was seeking a way to cope with the doctor's lack of positive news. They wouldn't discuss his case with her anymore, and this felt like a bad sign, so she decided to change things up and refresh the current state. 

After lunch, she decided to take a blue button-up shirt and change him. Dal-mi thought about asking for a nurse to do it because it felt too intimate, but it would look questionable if his own wife couldn't change his clothes. 

So she did it. 

Breathing scarcely and touching him with all the care in the world, Dal-mi tried to dress him without messing up with the serum tube. Her mind deadpanned when she saw his slender form, a little gangly after everything that happened, but not less beautiful. 

When she was closing the shirt's buttons, Dal-mi felt the bed moving a little and froze. Blinking rapidly and gulping down, she looked to the side ever so slowly and saw his eyes opening leisurely. 

"Ji-pyeong?" She asked in a weak tone, flabbergasted by what was happening. 

Listening to his own name, the man responded by moving his head and looking straight into Dal-mi's teary eyes. When Ji-pyeong opened his mouth to say something, the woman flew to his neck and hugged his soul out of him between sobs.

"You're awake, Ji-pyeong. You are finally awake." Dal-mi exclaimed while pressuring her chest to his in a dazzle. "I need to call the doctors, please don't sleep just yet." She explained, cleaning her tears and getting up to call a nurse, a doctor, anyone to confirm this wasn't a dream. 

Dal-mi came back with the main doctor and Joo-ri on her tail, feeling elated from seeing Ji-pyeong awake on the bed. He looked around in a daze as if getting familiar with where he was and processing every detail around him as well. 

“I’m going to examine you now, sir.” the doctor explained politely before reaching Ji-pyeong to check his vitals. 

“Excuse me, but what happened?” Ji-pyeong asked, finding it hard to breathe as his heart skipped from this unbearable dizziness in his mind. 

“You suffered a car accident and came here afterward.” Joo-ri explained, being used to deal with shocked patients, but extremely happy from seeing the man awake. “Your wife brought you in and has been taking care of you for almost a month now.” She completed, delivering the information about his coma in a lighter way. 

When the word wife came up, Ji-pyeong’s head flew to where Dal-mi stood, frozen from shyness and anxiety. As the man stared at her, with foggy eyes and a concerned expression, all she could do was hope to be able to explain herself to him in private. 

“Wife?” Ji-pyeong questioned, testing the word on his mouth as the doctor and the nurse checked the devices around him. “Does this mean that you… Sorry. Miss, are you Han Dal-mi?” He kept going, forcing his eyes to read the name tag on her beige blouse. 

Dal-mi only smiled, shyness mingling with happiness from seeing him awake, despite the difficulty to talk normally. Covering the name tag with her spare hand and staring at his puzzled expression, she tried to explain:

"Well, I had to put this name so they would allow me to visit you." Dal-mi said simply, shoulders going up and down as she looked at his perplexed expression. “I will explain to you later, okay?”

“Yes, ma’am.” He answered out of politeness, being tired from this exchange already. 

"Why are you being so formal?” Dal-mi questioned with a slow laugh in her voice, distress eating her inside. “You would like to know that I've spent weeks camped in this room." She completed, trying to change the subject and fishing for a different reaction. 

When the doctor left, Dal-mi came closer to his bed, tentative. Going forward to fix his pillow so Ji-pyeong could sit comfortably, the woman got stopped by his warm hand holding her wrist in place. 

"Excuse me, young lady…" Ji-pyeong said in a confused tone, eyes looking blank and a dazed expression framing his sharp face, "Do I know you?"

**xx**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #JIPYEONG: I WISH I COULD WAKE UP WITH AMNESIA 
> 
> yes I DID THIS!!!!! gawd ive been dreaming with some drama for jidal since the kdrama ended so its nice to finally put this out there in the world lmao 
> 
> are yall ready for sarcastic jipyeong comeback? dal-mi running after him (without losing her personality, ofc)? injae and jipyeong scenes? see you on the next chapter! 
> 
> as always, hit me up on the comment section and over stan twt (@chancekai) <3


	3. oh baby why did you run away?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when Ji-pyeong wakes up almost four years in the past. 
> 
> Or the one where his sarcastic being comes back to life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WE'RE BACK AFTER A SHORT BREAK! oomfs i wrote this today at 4am so im sorry in advance for any mistakes. 
> 
> also, this might be my favorite thing i wrote on jidal after pofaf's chapter seven so i hope you enjoy it. 
> 
> once again, thank you for reading this and enjoying my crazy plots and writing schedule. have a nice experience and i'll see you at the end of the chapter <3

**xx**

Waking up in a hospital room should have been the first sign something was off.

However, opening his eyes to a beautiful woman dressing him up was an otherworldly experience. 

Ji-pyeong felt like having the Universe's worst hangover, body all stiff and weak, mind fogged by medicines he didn't remember taking the night before. Looking around the cozy and decorated room didn't help at all, and a dreadful feeling took space in his stomach when he heard the nurse explaining what happened. 

A car accident. 

He was involved in a car accident so tragic it stole a month away from his life. 

And now he had a wife? 

"Excuse me, young lady…" Ji-pyeong said, staring profoundly at the warm brown eyes of the beautiful stranger fixing his pillows, eyes that felt too familiar for him to be comfortable. "Do I know you?" 

Ji-pyeong had a steeled memory, being known as an unforgiven boss and a perfectionist investor. He would, for sure, remember marrying such an enthralling woman like the one staring at him, dumbfounded as he felt. 

"What?" She whispered, coming closer to his face and thoroughly intoxicating him with her vanilla scent. 

Suddenly, she was all around him. 

Ji-pyeong felt overwhelmed by Dal-mi's presence. Because his senses had been asleep during the coma, his brain now seemed focused only on processing the woman in front of him. 

Unexpectedly, he felt her sugary fragrance embracing him as a comfortable blanket, making him warm inside-out. Everywhere he looked, there was only her: soft hair, full lips, smooth skin and sharp features indicating she was either too thin or naturally fierce. 

Ji-pyeong could sense every patch of skin touching her velvety wrist, the woman's fast heartbeats matching his as his heart raced from their sudden closeness. Moving his eyes down her slender throat, the man saw when she gulped down out of nervousness, the movement making him salivate as a famished man. 

As he devoured her expressions and reactions to his touch, Ji-pyeong could only wonder if she tasted as sweet and intoxicating as her smell. 

It wouldn't be too bad to have as a wife, after all. 

"I will…" She started to say, noticing that they were a breath away from one another's lips. 

"Yes?" Ji-pyeong asked, head tumbling to the side as he measured her every move as a prey watching its feast. 

"I will call the doctor." Dal-mi explained, fleeing from the room with a frantic heart. 

Slowing down in the hall, the woman rested her trembling body in the wall and tried to text her sister with unfocused fingers. Something was off, and it wasn't just his memory. 

Who was the man back in the room? 

Swallowing down with difficulty, Dal-mi proceeded to search for his doctor and explain what happened. Earlier than what was deemed safe for her own mind, they were back in the room. Overwhelmed by his manners, the woman stood meters away from Ji-pyeong's bed as he kept measuring her during the medical team's questions. 

"Can you tell me your name?" Joo-ri asked, noting everything down and looking entirely professional now. 

"Han Ji-pyeong, if my dearest wife hadn't changed it." He answered, sarcasm dripping from his voice as his eyes darkened while looking at Dal-mi across the room. 

"Can you tell me what day it is?" Another doctor questioned, evaluating the situation in hand. 

"Well, sir, I can't say for sure because I had a month stolen from me." Ji-pyeong fired back, annoyed by how tired he felt as their lab rat experiment. 

"Please, cooperate." Dal-mi requested in a low tone the man almost didn't register after Joo-ri sent her a pleading stare. 

"What will I win in return?" He asked, eyes travelling over her body in a distressing and leisurely rhythm. 

A loss of words, Dal-mi tried her best to manage an angry face as an answer. Feeling equally concerned and slightly feverish, the woman was divided between dread and an acute desire she hadn't felt for a long time. 

Ji-pyeong was awake for less than thirty minutes and it was already turning this into a hardship for her. They were indeed off to a great start. 

"As far as I remember, I have a speech to give on Sandbox tomorrow to a bunch of dreamers." Ji-pyeong explained, shoulders going up and down in feigned disinterest as he read everyone's expression.

Apparently, he had lost a lot. 

Three years and a half, to be exact. After a brief gathering from the doctors, a gentle nurse called Nam Joo-ri came over his bed to explain what had happened. Using simple words and a kind tone that made Ji-pyeong nervous, the woman said his brain erased years of his life to cure him of the accident's trauma. 

While he listened to the nurse explaining how amnesia is common during almost death experiences, Ji-pyeong could only follow the beautiful stranger's reaction. From hearing the doctor's prognosis to listening to Joo-ri explaining things to him, the woman had stood wholly frozen. 

Looking paler and weaker by the second, Ji-pyeong was about to suggest for someone to put her in a hospital bed as well. Before he could say a word, the room’s door slammed against the wall, and two known figures came in hurriedly. 

"Ha-Haelmoni?" Ji-pyeong asked, feeling his mouth dry as the older woman's figure was processed by his brain. 

"Good Boy!" Haelmoni exclaimed, running to him and holding his face as she checked him out "Good Boy, are you okay? How can you not remember what happened?" She kept asking, touching him in such a kind and familiar way that tears began to come down. 

"Is this really you? Are you really here?" He questioned, staring at the kind eyes of the woman who took him in during the worst phase of his life. "Haelmoni, I'm so sorry for not reaching out to you, I truly am." 

"Please, don't cry." The older woman asked, cleaning his tears as she cried as well. "It's okay, my dear. Everything will be okay." She said time and again, embracing Ji-pyeong as he wept openly. 

Despite the sudden wave of emotion, Haelmoni looked to her granddaughter and to understand what was happening. Being helped by In-jae, the younger one seemed to be entirely lost. 

Dal-mi felt like she was falling down an infinite abyss. The speck of time it took for her brain to process what losing three years worth of memories meant made her feel numb to Injae's touch and efforts to reach her. 

She knew now how severe the accident had been. 

As if it wasn't hard enough to hear the doctors explaining that his awakening was a miracle, knowing that his memory loss could be permanent was like another arrow shot through her chest. Knowing that his brain deleted precious information about their relationship, about who she was, made her think that maybe she was responsible somehow for what had happened. 

Dal-mi felt utterly alone in this situation. 

Forgetting about her seemed to be his tool to surviving. Had she been so bad to him to deserve this gnawing sadness now? 

Maybe she was. And now the Universe was making her pay it all back. 

"Are you okay?" Her sister asked after offering some water. "They said his memories could come back with time…"

"And they also said it's more common that they never come back at all." Dal-mi cut in with a hurt tone "His brain doesn't want to revive memories related to the accident, In-jae." 

"Still, you never know." She fought back, trying to bring some peace to her younger sister. 

"In-jae? Won In-jae?" Ji-pyeong asked suddenly, not crying anymore but still attached to Haelmoni's side. 

Listening to him calling her sister with such an intimate and endearing tone was a hit Dal-mi wasn't expecting. One that made her heart ache tremendously. 

"Hi there, you." In-jae answered with a smile, trying to balance her happiness from seeing him alive and the concern with his current state. "It’s Seo In-jae now, but I believe you should rest a little and we can catch up later." She requested, coming close to his bed in unprecise steps. 

"I'm glad to see a more familiar face around." Ji-pyeong joked, taking her hand and pressuring in a way that made Dal-mi's insides feel compressed as well. "Apparently I have a wife." He fake-whispered, speaking in a high tone while looking at his said wife with a mischievous look. 

"Don't worry, Good Boy." Haelmoni hopped in, seeing the distressed expression in her granddaughter's face. "It will all make sense tomorrow, and now you will obey your kind doctors and go to sleep." She ordered, fixing his pillows and blanket so he could rest. 

Ji-pyeong dozed off fast, still a little groggy from the medicines and thoroughly tired from everything that happened. As soon as the three women saw him asleep, they looked at each other knowingly. 

They were in trouble, and there was no coming back from this. 

**xx**

When the sun came up a few days later, a whole different Dal-mi awoke as well. 

Haelmoni and In-jae basically dragged her out of the hospital, forcing her to come home and sleep for more than three hours before returning to Ji-pyeong's room. Following the doctor's orders, they both decided it would be better if he stayed alone for a while to process what was happening. 

Using the opportunity to take Dal-mi away was a gift from the skies. They tried their best to make the woman think about other things at home, and In-jae even went the extra mile by overloading her with the Smart City's project demands. 

However, nothing could take Dal-mi’s mind from Ji-pyeong. 

Ji-pyeong and his newfound sarcasm and jokes. His flirty personality being thrown around with the nurses and even with In-jae. 

Ji-pyeong and the puzzled expression he kept sending her away. Looking at her as if Dal-mi was nothing but a stranger. 

Even after her grandmother explained they weren't married and that she was the girl from the letters, all the man did was feign indifference and evade the subject. Well, at least some things haven't changed, his evasive from real conversations being a pair to her one. 

Despite her family's best efforts, Dal-mi kept in touch with Joo-ri. Her efforts lead her to learn that Ji-pyeong would start physiotherapy and psychological sessions to retrieve his old being later on that week. Accordingly to the nurse, he needed motivation and incentive to get better during his observation period. 

So she decided to be his stimulant. 

In the purest meaning of the world, of course. 

Dal-mi could get over his rudeness and evasiveness, the hot-and-cold game Ji-pyeong seemed to love playing. Anything for him to get better, after all, that's what friends do for each other, right?

There was no ulterior motive behind her actions, seriously. 

When Saturday's first sunbeam lit up her room, Dal-mi got up happily to get ready for a hospital visit. As it was marked in the calendar above her table, today was Ji-pyeong's first session with a physiotherapist, a perfect opportunity for them to talk and relearn stuff. 

Leaving before Haelmoni could notice her absence, Dal-mi got to the hospital in no time. She almost didn't feel time passing on the bus ride, despite her brain's best efforts to make her anxious and jittery about seeing Ji-pyeong again. 

Explaining her relationship to Joo-ri was a hardship. Still, the woman allowed Dal-mi to visit as close family despite her cheap lie, having found the entire situation a little uncanny, but a good omen somehow. 

Entering the hospital was the easy part, but facing Ji-pyeong would be another ordeal. 

Opening the door to his room gave her the perfect vision of his graceful chest, as the man was dressing up after a long shower. Deadpanning, Dal-mi only stood still while the door sounds announced her presence to Ji-pyeong. 

"Are you going to faint now?" He asked with laughter in his tone "I'm not really fit to be your saviour now, maybe you could wait for a few sessions before acting up." 

His sarcasm and coldness was, once again, a slap to her face. Swallowing hard and getting over the butterflies frantic fly in her stomach, Dal-mi came into his room trying to act as the CEO she was: all bossy and determined. 

Leaving her stuff on the sofa she had slept too many nights, the woman stood in front of Ji-pyeong's bed with arms crossed. Ignoring his gorgeous wet black hair and devilish smile, she said:

"I'm here to accompany you to your session following the doctor's recommendation." 

"Well, I'm pretty sure they recommended strangers to be away from me." Ji-pyeong said right back, sensing her lie from a mile "You see, I can't be distressed by pretty ladies looking bossy. My poor heart can't take it." He completed, feasting in his word’s effects in the woman's weak armour. 

Watching her walls coming down would always be funny, even though he couldn't remember who she was to him. 

He could remember the Dal-mi from the letters very efficiently, having thought about her most of his life. She was a friend, a life-guide and his companion during dark times, but the woman in front of him? For some reason, Ji-pyeong found it hard to conceive her as the girl he once adored. 

It was like his brain, this stupid thing that seemed to be bossing him around too much recently, was trying to stop him from doing so. This resistance, the pang in Ji-pyeong's chest every time he forced himself to remember something, anything, related to this woman, only made him wonder if she wasn't the reason why his mind decided that amnesia was more manageable than reality. 

So keeping her away with his precise sarcasm and sharpened tongue was his strategy. One Ji-pyeong was not only thoroughly applying, but enjoying as well. 

"Since I'm not a stranger, we should be fine. Let's get going now, shall we?" Dal-mi explained briefly after recomposing herself. 

He wanted to do things like that? So be it. Two people could fight this battle, and she had learned a truckload of stuff from his witty personality. 

Before Ji-pyeong could keep their joyful bantering, another nurse showed up to pick him up in a lame wheelchair. As fun as it was to play the bad boy with Dal-mi and every woman around him, he was still weak out of his mind and in need of help. 

Maybe accepting her company would make this situation bearable. 

His first physiotherapy session was a test for their relationship to develop. They spent almost two hours fighting one another as the doctors tried to get him to cooperate and Ji-pyeong did his best to be an annoying little ass to everyone. 

Not because he didn't desire to get better, he wanted things to go back to normal more than anyone helping his case. In reality, Ji-pyeong was having a hard time accepting his own weakness and the on-going dependency on others. 

As an orphan and a self-made human being, he had learned to feign for himself too early in life. Being forced to grow up quickly and at a young age made Ji-pyeong develop trusting issues and intimacy problems that ran too deep for him to run around counting on strangers. 

Even if his body was screaming for him to do so. Even if he got exhausted from a few steps. 

Because Dal-mi knew him better now, she soon realized his hidden intentions with all the madness the man was spreading in the medical team. Believing in her mindset to survive Ji-pyeong's crazy moods, she decided to be his secret aid and endure the daily bantering. 

In doing so, she hoped he would distract himself during the tough sessions. Dal-mi hoped that Having something else to focus could help the man to get better soon.

Soon, Dal-mi became his annoying and too-beautiful-for-her-own-safety shadow. Following him around in every appointment and staying unnecessary extra hours at his room afterwards, the woman began to feel too familiar for Ji-pyeong to comply. 

Suddenly, his medical sessions became less of a burden, and their fights turned into a comfortable routine, like an old cozy shirt you can't get rid of. Even the staff started to get familiar with their exchanges, laughing while they offended each other and choosing sides, most of the time, Dal-mi's side. 

One day, during a hard physiotherapy session where he felt like regressing in their development, Ji-pyeong saw himself instinctively looking out for Dal-mi as frustration gnawed at him. When the calmness of seeing her following his every move settled in his heart, the man freaked out. 

Acting out on the team, Ji-pyeong chose to be extremely rude with everyone and leave for his room by himself, avoiding Dal-mi's constant attempts to help him. Listening to her asking forgiveness for the staff while he limped with the crutch's help made everything worse, and everything he wanted was to be alone. 

Entering his room, Ji-pyeong tried to slam the door, but Dal-mi's palm stopped his motion as she came behind him. Always the shadow, occasionally one step ahead in his needs and feelings, watching him knowingly and foretelling his thoughts. 

It was disturbing to see how she knew him when he couldn't remember a thing from who Dal-mi was now. Learning everything from the beginning was hard enough without her showing affection and care whenever they were alone or during arbitrary situations. 

She would sometimes get too close while fixing his pillows, or laugh too loud from his teasing. Every so often, Ji-pyeong would find her staring intensely at his eyes when she was distracted. Concern and a profound affection melted her chocolate irises as Dal-mi followed his every move. 

He often had woken up at night with her vibrating voice reading him letters, the ones she never sent and the old words they exchanged in the past. Ji-pyeong would pretend to be asleep only to doze off hearing Dal-mi's lovingly tone repeating the secrets of her heart. 

And when he woke up to her figure sleeping at his side, usually wrapped up in a chair or resting her head over his bed, fingers so close from his, Ji-pyeong would only stare. He had spent so many sleepless dawns memorizing Dal-mi's expression that it now felt like a familiar map of emotions for him. Every trace, curve and mark was branded in his brain. 

He did it because everyday Ji-pyeong was afraid to wake up without recognizing her again. 

Knowing that he started to lean on her, searching for Dal-mi when things got hard and allowing her to enter his personal space made him feel sick. Not only because he thought this feeling was a weakness, but because he was afraid to lose her as well. 

Ji-pyeong knew from In-Jae and Haelmoni explanations that he felt something for Dal-mi in the past and ended up being rejected for the real Nam Do-san, a boy he knew was stupid without even seeing it. Regardless of being unable to remember exactly how everything unravelled, he knew in his heart that what happened after the accident could be a blessing for his once broken heart. 

Maybe distancing himself from her was the best option in this scenario, before it was too late and he got hurt all over again. 

Ji-pyeong had already lost too much, and owning things would only lead to the same desolation and abandonment. 

"Care to explain yourself?" Dal-mi asked when he said nothing, eyes focused on the ground as he diligently tried to ignore her. 

"Leave me alone." He said simply, too tired to even resemble any respect towards her. 

"What? What the fuck is happening, Ji-pyeong?" She questioned, getting closer to his bed and noticing how hardening his expressions were from her proximity. "You are doing fine, amazing actually as I keep listening Joo-ri saying every time. Why are you acting like a child right now?" 

"Get out, I want to be alone." Ji-pyeong tried again, flinching from the contrasting hardness in her tone and the continuous affection she used to say his name. 

Ji-pyeong could easily listen to Dal-mi calling his name for a whole day, and this was a concerning sign of how fucked up he would end up if this kept going too fast. 

How did they jump from strangers to this familiar relationship in a few weeks? As much as this looked like what was meant to be for them, it was beyond scary. 

"Don't." Dal-mi said, ordered actually, with a harsh tone in her voice. 

"What?" Ji-pyeong asked, looking at her for the first time and regretting the moment he processed how she looked. 

Dal-mi was like a brazing fire, flamed by her rage and disappointment in a determined posture that could drive any man to his knees. Staring straight to Ji-pyeong's soul, the woman once soft features were as sharp as a hunter's knight. 

And this all-consuming desire heating his solar plexus as lava spreading inside him was a very unwelcome guest during this fight. Ji-pyeong's hands were burning from a desperate need to touch her, and this sickening emotion would soon break his resolve. 

"Are you not listening? Get the fuck out, Dal-mi." He yelled, throwing the clutch on the floor with pent up anger. 

"Listen up!" Dal-mi fired back, entering his personal space in a second and holding his chiselled jaw in her hot hand "You don't get to act up with me, so control yourself right now." She explained in a grave tone, eyes travelling his face and staying a second more than needed on his round lips. 

"Please, get out." Ji-pyeong pleaded weakly, feeling exhausted by her overwhelming presence. 

"Why are you doing this? Are you seriously trying to block me out? After everything we went through?" The woman asked, feeling bewildered by his sudden transformation.

"Don't you get it? As far as I know, we had nothing." He answered honestly, using hurtful words on purpose to get her away from him. "For me, these are the first weeks we shared after fifteen years, and it might be the last ones after I'm released." 

Wounded was not the word that could precisely describe Dal-mi's state after hearing his words. Sure, she was profoundly hurt by what he was saying, but most of all, the woman was mad at his behaviour. 

Ji-pyeong was scared. Entirely and wholeheartedly afraid to let someone in, considering that the amnesia took him back to a time where feigning for himself was martial law. 

Little did he know that Dal-mi's fear was fighting his own. She, too, was terrified from what was going on between them ever since she started to accompany him everywhere. 

Being his aid made Ji-pyeong her support as well, and it was so easy to fall into this relationship that she would see herself wishing for more at times. As if spending every available hour around him wasn't enough, the man would sometimes show up in her dreams. Her sleep time would turn into tormenting hours with scenarios indicating what they could have been.

What they could be if only they stood a chance out of this damned situation. 

Dal-mi got too good at ignoring Sa-ha's advice for her to be careful and became a professional in evading Do-san's effort to talk about their relationship. In reality, the woman saw herself earning something more as she sacrificed hours of sleep and free time to be by Ji-pyeong's side.

Something different. 

In the entire journey from Ji-pyeong's accident to his speedy recovery, Dal-mi got in touch with the part she had lost during her relationship with Do-san. Maybe it was the challenging bantering with Ji-pyeong, maybe it was the time she got to spend thinking about what mattered in life, but something had shifted inside her being, and the difficult man in front of her should be thanked by this process. 

Because she felt more like herself, being reconnected with long-lost ideas, Dal-mi wanted to make Ji-pyeong reconnect with himself as well. 

That's why she decided to start reading the letters for him at night, reviving conversations they had in the past during his appointments and even forging moments so he could remember anything. Despite the lack of results from her efforts, Ji-pyeong acting up and shutting her off would not happen, not when they were advancing so well together. 

"You can be a mean asshole to me anytime, you can scream, shout and even cry as well." Dal-mi said, holding his face in place so he wouldn't escape her eyes. 

As if Ji-pyeong could look anywhere else but the bright woman in front of him. Right now, Dal-mi shined as bright as the summer Sun, lighting up dark parts of his being sole with her blazing eyes. 

"What you can't do is get me away, no matter how much you try to shut me out from your life."

"Why are you doing this?" He asked, feeling defeated by her word's intensity. 

"Because I owe you this." Dal-mi answered simply "Don't you think I feel sick and responsible for what you are going through? Don't you think I'm constantly afraid of our relationship development and ashamed by how I failed you in the past?" She questioned, tears gathering at her pained eyes. 

"Dal-mi…" Ji-pyeong said, tentatively touching the arm who held his face much softer now. 

"Don't." Dal-mi repeated herself in a hurt tone "We won't do this now because you have to get better. You are so close from being released, and this is not the time, nor the place, to have this conversation." She explained, letting him go and getting away too fast.

"When?" The man asked while staring at where she was. 

"Soon." She answered, unsure if he was asking when would they have this conversation or when would he be released from the hospital. "Make sure to recompose yourself before tomorrow's appointment, will you? Also, you might want to think about a good apology for your behaviour today." Dal-mi completed in her CEO voice, picking up her things and leaving hurriedly. 

As the door closed, Ji-pyeong felt more alone than ever. 

Not only had she taken away his support, but part of himself as well.

**xx**

Weeks passed in a blur of appointments and positive feedback from the medical team assigned to Ji-pyeong's case. 

Unfortunately, his relationship with Dal-mi felt damaged in a way he didn't know how to fix just yet. Their former closeness became an unbearable formality that hurt both, despite being a needed measure to process their emotions. 

On the bright side, Haelmoni began to visit more as the doctors started to prepare his release. Apparently, Ji-pyeong had advanced steadily in his recovery and was now able to finish the treatment at home, after almost two whole months living in the hospital. 

Words from the corridors said he would earn a little goodbye party from the doctors and nurses, even the ones Ji-pyeong was flirty with. As a matter of fact, the man couldn't wait to leave the hospital, and it's awful memories behind. 

At least at home, he would be able to distance himself from Dal-mi and think things through without her gravitating around him. Maybe their separation would make everything better, and life could find its own rhythm on its own. 

Ji-pyeong's psychological team wasn't as thrilled as the physical one. He didn't seem to recover any memories from the almost four years he had lost in the accident during the treatment. It wasn't for lack of efforts and techniques, they had indeed used everything to stimulate his brain, but the damned thing had decided to work alone. 

At this point, the doctors only wished that a familiar environment such as his apartment could make some changes in his current state. However, Ji-pyeong felt that he was holding himself back from remembering anything, too afraid to deal with his past life's unknown facts. 

Moving on with a fresh space for new memories seemed to be a disguised blessing. Having suffered enough already, Ji-pyeong would accept what came for him in this life. 

**xx**

The medical release day came too soon, despite being more than welcome. 

Abruptly, he was being welcomed by a warm party organized by the medical team, eating lots of cake and greasy food they kept out of his diet. Listening to the doctors' positive insights and the nurses goodbye made him feel genuinely appreciated, but deeply sad.

Leaving the hospital meant not only saying goodbye to the fantastic people that helped him gain his strength and independence back. It also meant leaving Dal-mi. 

Ji-pyeong spent his last day at the hospital packing up with Haelmoni's help, chatting with the woman in a newfound rhythm while ignoring her granddaughter's moves around him. Disregarding her casual touches and the overwhelming scent was more demanding, but this was indeed a training from when they went separate ways. 

"Well, I guess we're done here." Ji-pyeong announced, looking around at the empty room that felt like home for a time. 

"I got the medical release, and we're ready to go." Dal-mi affirmed, pleased that this day had come. "Let me call us a cab home, Haelmoni. The hospital is dropping Ji-pyeong off." She said, looking sideways to the man as she smiled at the older woman. 

"Not yet." Haelmoni interrupted, raising her hand and stopping their motion. "I have an announcement to make." She explained, gathering their attention with the sudden declaration. 

"Please don't tell me they decided I need to stay more time." Ji-pyeong cried out, trying to fix the heavy atmosphere with a bad joke. 

"You wish." Dal-mi snorted in a low tone, enough for Ji-pyeong to listen and feel offended.

"Excuse me, but I'm not the one…" He started to say before Haelmoni cut in.

"Children, don't be like this now. We can't have this behaviour around the house." She said, a devilish smile they had never seen turning her calm expressions in a mischievous one, the same Haelmoni used when she was plotting something.

"What?" Dal-mi asked in a hurry. 

Before Haelmoni could say something, Dal-mi and Ji-pyeong felt trapped, as if they had fallen in the exact spot the woman wanted to. Dread freezing their insides and a wave of anxiety washing their good mood, they could only stare at the woman when she said:

"We're moving to Good Boy's house." Haelmoni explained, a smile so bright and big on her face that even her eyes closed.

**xx**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALL HAIL HAELMONI! LONG LIVE THE GRANDMA (i wont k word her on this one okay i swear)
> 
> yes guys: sarcastic jipyeong 2021 comeback, im writing him like the funny character he was during su first episodes before phr got amnesia and started to write a different show, AND I ABSOLUTELY ADORE THIS VERSION OF HJP
> 
> as always, hit me up on the comment section (im now being good at answering everyone) or over stan twt (@chancekai). we're close to 1K ceci warriors and as i promised there will be bonus chapters on pofaf regarding dal-mi secret letters to jipyeong.
> 
> SEE YALL THERE BYEEEEEE


	4. I hear your voice in my sleep at night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when ceci-nim goes crazy and writes sixteen pages for an update. 
> 
> Or the one I deliver pain and pleasure to my dear readers (lmao)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEYOOOOOO cant believe i wrote, revised and posted this chapter in the same day lhdgkdhla 
> 
> lemme use this space to thank everyone that been reading this lovely story i wanted to write, you guys are amazing. also i want to announce to the unknowing people that there are two more jidal plots and one story for injae living in my mind, so at some point yall will choose which one i will write 
> 
> MEANING = follow me on twitter to vote on stuff and send me reactions 
> 
> now im rambling because im exhausted LETS GOOOOOOOOOO

**xx**

Staying in the hospital wouldn’t be too bad after all. 

It was definitely better than sharing the same square foot with the woman living rent-free on his mind ever since she decided to be his shadow, his aid. There was no way on Earth Ji-pyeong could handle spending all his free hours with Dal-mi, sharing these last days with her in the hospital was already hard enough. 

Having the woman gravitating around him as the Sun itself was more challenging than surviving thousands of physio and psychological sessions. Ji-pyeong was unable to inhale pure air because her vanilla scent was everywhere all the damn time, making him intoxicated and weak at the mind. 

Despite their fight and the adopted distance, feelings seemed to be escalating real fast. A cold treatment was not enough to detoxicate themselves, and soon the force pulling them together turned into an unbearable force, always making the other steal glances and subtle touches with no excuse.

As the frustration and fear from living together seemed to be a shared emotion between them, they kept trying to convince Haelmoni to change her mind until lunchtime came in and everyone got hungry. Staying in the hospital room screaming with each other turned weird real fast, so leaving was inevitable. 

Aware that Haelmoni's sight wasn’t getting better and the disease was taking a toll on her also made Ji-pyeong to give up, Dal-mi coming right after, once she realized her grandmother was tired. 

Accepting the defeat, they stood silently in their corners as the woman finished packing up to leave. Haelmoni walked down the hallway to the entrance like a queen after winning a battle, the youngsters following after her with grief expressions, barely looking at each other as their fight still lingered. 

There was no coming back now. Living together would simply be hell, especially compared to the two months in the hospital. 

At least there, Ji-pyeong got distracted by his responsibilities and avoided getting thoroughly infatuated by Dal-mi’s existence. Now? He was doomed. 

Distracted by his fear, the hundreds of scenarios flying through his mind, Ji-pyeong almost didn’t see the car coming up to take them home. As the women entered the vehicle and left the door open to him, he felt his heart rate going up pretty damn fast. 

“Are you going to sit and cry because grandmommy ordered you around?” Dal-mi asked with sarcasm in her voice, looking annoyed by how things turned out and ignoring his panicking face. 

Holding his breath to displease the woman, Ji-pyeong hopped in the car and stood profusely still. Before the cursed thing started to move, his hands flew to the seat belt as he tried to calm the unwelcome panic attack piling up. 

Suddenly, his body felt all wrong, sight becoming unfocused as dread gnawed his insides and body started to tremble all over. When the driver sped into the street, Ji-pyeong instinctively took Dal-mi’s free hand on his own. 

Ignoring the sharp look she gave him and closing his eyes to ignore the rapid movement outside the window, the man tried his best to control himself before starting to hyperventilate. Every car and street sound began to play inside Ji-pyeong’s body, making it harder to suppress the unyielding panic melting any distracting thoughts. 

Apparently, cars weren’t his thing anymore. 

“Ji-pyeong. Han Ji-pyeong, are you listening to me?” Dal-mi called out for the tenth time, concern dripping from her hushed tone.

“What is happening, Good Boy?” Haelmoni asked, looking around for him without understanding a thing because of her poor sight. 

“I’m… fine.” He tried to answer, hyperventilating as soon as he opened his mouth.

“Please sir, stop the car.” Dal-mi ordered quickly, making the driver swerve the car smoothly to the sidewalk, an effort to avoid scaring Ji-pyeong even more.

“What are you doing?” Haelmoni asked when they suddenly dropped out of the vehicle.

“We are going to walk home, Haelmoni. Don’t worry, you can go forward and we’ll text the building to allow your entrance.” Her granddaughter explained, hand holding Ji-pyeong’s trembling arm outside the vehicle. 

“Are you sure?” She tried again. 

“Yes, I am. We don’t want this Good Boy to get chubby now that he’s free from the hospital.” Dal-mi joked, faking a laugh before closing the door and allowing the car to leave. 

Breathing freely now that Haelmoni was away, the woman turned to Ji-pyeong only to see his pale being trying to breathe the city’s air. He was completely lost, eyes rapidly travelling everywhere at once as his brain fought the panic attack. 

Dal-mi crossed the space and reached a public bench, forcing him to sit and focus on her, ignoring other distracting details and the strangers staring at their exchange. Holding Ji-pyeong’s chin in her hand, and offering the free one for the man to hold, Dal-mi made him observe her breathing rhythm and copy it. 

They stood like this for many minutes, the woman pressuring his fingers as Ji-pyeong controlled himself. Reaching for his wrist, Dal-mi felt his heartbeat slowing down as she kept looking profoundly at the man’s warm eyes, relishing in the moment that felt extremely intimate despite the situation.

“Do you feel better?” She asked, releasing his chin and putting a lock of hair in place so he could see her properly, a small affectionate gesture to soothe his heart.

“Thank you.” Ji-pyeong said simply, squeezing her hand as his body began to feel normal again. 

“Want to walk now? I’m really hungry.”

“Yes, I am starving for a meal outside the hospital.” He agreed, getting up and following Dal-mi’s steps. 

Realizing they were still holding hands, Ji-pyeong looked at her in a challenge, testing the waters to know if Dal-mi would keep their hands together. Being torn apart by his blazing stare, she hurriedly let him go and picked up the phone as an excuse. 

“Can’t forget to call the building so they can allow Haelmoni’s entrance.” She explained with a forced laugh, watching Ji-pyeong mischievous smile coming up as he head moved to the side playfully. 

"Yeah, you're absolutely right. We wouldn't want to leave the poor old lady turning blind alone." Ji-pyeong answered, snorting as they stopped underneath a tree's shadow.

Dal-mi tipped nervously, avoiding the man's eyes as his old disturbing self seemed to have returned. Getting it done and making sure Haelmoni would be safely escorted inside, she simply smiled at Ji-pyeong before speed walking forward. 

Listening to his laugh behind her back made a little smile find its way to Dal-mi's face. Wanting to have him as a company was a hidden desire, one she yielded to by slowing her pace until they were walking coordinately.

They spent a few minutes searching for a place to eat, hands softly brushing and shoulders closer than needed. Despite the hunger making camp at their stomachs, sharing this precious moment was feeding their hurt souls.

“I think we should buy you a welcome plant since you’re coming back home.” Dal-mi suggested, stopping in front of a flower shop with a knowing smile. 

"A plant?" Ji-pyeong asked, dumbfounded by the certainty in her tone.

"You used to be a plant's person as far as I remember. And you know, we need your memory back so we can be free from each other." She explained as she would do with a kid.

"Would it be too bad if we lived together?" He asked honestly, looking at the plants and ignoring her surprise "We could actually have some fun." Ji-pyeong completed, staring at her startled eyes.

Profound exchanges as this one became common between them since the accident. They would simply stay very still and silent, communicating through affectionate and heated stares until one looked away. 

Usually, it was Dal-mi. 

Not because she didn't want to look at him, but because she wanted too much. Dal-mi felt like she could dive into his soul through the dark brown eyes who kept seeking her around, jumping from this cliff without thinking twice, trusting Ji-pyeong would be there to protect her fall. 

Because, in truth, he would be. And it was too damn scary how much she wanted him to do it, so Dal-mi kept looking away.

At least until he decided she couldn’t do it anymore, from then on it was truly a mystery. 

"Let's go." She said softly, pulling him in by holding his forearm. 

Ji-pyeong entered a world of green existing in a concrete's jungle. Everywhere around him, multiple types of plants and flowers created a vivacious and perfumed environment. 

Seeing this place and its colors overwhelmed his senses in a second, forcing memories into his mind as a physiological response to a familiar moment. Ji-pyeong saw clear images of himself buying serum at a flower shop similar to this one and then applying it in a money tree plant standing wobbly in a light pink vase near his apartment’s window. 

Despite being a rushed memory and staying a few seconds on his mind’s eye, it was enough to make the man shiver all over. Apparently, resisting to remember wasn’t going to work anymore, as the number of impulses outside the hospital surpassed his rationality. 

Which meant he could soon remember things related to Dal-mi, and staying with her was the worst idea if Ji-pyeong wanted to fight any resemblance of past pain. 

As soon as the woman showed up, holding a similar money tree, Ji-pyeong deadpanned. Every thought of leaving went away as soon as her smile showed up, lighting up his insides and painting everything in bright colors. 

Ji-pyeong could fight, and cry openly, but there was no way he was leaving this girl’s side. 

“This one looks pretty cute, we should take some vitamins for it.” Dal-mi announced, using a funny name since she didn’t know what the liquid things were called. 

Ji-pyeong laughed blatantly, realizing the little devil’s intention with this flower shop-spree. Because he was having so much fun seeing her effort to force his mind to work as it should, the man said nothing and allowed Dal-mi to wander around. 

Watching her coming and going, pretending to know what she was doing, was the funniest thing to happen on this hard day. Ji-pyeong still felt the panic attack lingering in his chest, a burning heat forcing him to remember that there was no control after the car accident, only a chain of reactions. 

And a spirited kind woman to take care of him. 

“Pick this one, it’s better.” Ji-pyeong hopped in when she almost bought a pesticide for a brand new plant.

“How do you know this?” Dal-mi asked, taking the pesticide out of his reach and staring openly, curiosity sparkling in her eyes. 

“Instinct, you know, men used to be farmers back in the Stone Age.” Ji-pyeong answered right away with a cheap lie “I guess it’s my inner male speaking.” He completed, forcing a gruff posture and earning a laugh as an answer.

“You do look like a caveman most of the time.” She fired back, shoulders going up and down as she laughed and paid for everything they bought. 

“Why are you paying?” 

“Because I can charge interest in the future.” Dal-mi answered with a smile, opening the door and waiting for Ji-pyeong to carry everything. 

“Can we please eat or do you want me to starve to death?” Ji-pyeong begged, hands full with bags now. 

“Wouldn’t this be a pretty picture?” The woman said, feigning a plotting face that scared him right away “Don’t worry, I know just the place.” Dal-mi explained, smiling openly before starting to walk with determinate steps. 

**xx**

Apparently, her plotting face wasn’t fake. 

They were seated in a table on a random ramen joint, people coming and going as lunchtime hours reached its end. Mainly, the costumers dressed as recent graduate students, and premature adventurous entrepreneurs, the red badge dangling from their necks indicating they were Sandbox’s people. 

Dal-mi ordered up as Ji-pyeong looked everywhere at once, feeling familiar to the space for some reason. Sooner than expected, the food came in and before he could ravish the bowl, the younger one took it from him. 

“Why are you stealing my food?” He asked, annoyed while holding his chopsticks as a weapon. 

“You don’t seem to remember. Which is actually fitting.” Dal-mi began to say, mixing his noodles for him to eat “This is the place you said you liked me.” She explained, looking at him with a warm smile. 

As if hypnotised by her hand movements, Ji-pyeong got the same images flashed in his mind. Instead of seeing Dal-mi mixing the noodles, he saw himself, doing the exact same thing as he said dreadful words: 

_“I like you, Ms. Seo” His voice announced, a serious tone that didn’t match the anxiety gnawing in at every word._

Looking up to the woman in this memory, he only saw a puzzled and hurt expression. Regardless of the expressed emotions in her much younger face, Dal-mi stared at his eyes with a map of unnamed feelings, making Ji-pyeong jittery and excited at the same time. 

Without thinking twice about it, he could tell this happened after she discovered lies about the letters. He couldn’t remember which lies, but it was easy to understand that she felt profoundly hurt by it.

“Are you sure you’re going to eat this whole bowl?” present Dal-mi asked, taking him out of his daydream. 

“Well, I survived your food. Nothing else can get me.” Ji-pyeong joked instinctively, making her laugh as his brain processed the memories. “I’m sorry” He spilt out as the images turned into dust. 

“You actually remember” Dal-mi answered, ignoring his excuse as happiness and fear fought for a place in her heart. “I can’t believe this worked.”

“Does this mean you’re closer now to running away again?” He asked brazenly, his mind being taken by the picture of an unfinished puzzle, one that told the whole story of what happened between them.

“Please, don’t. We just had a win here.” She pleaded, a hand going to the bridge of her nose out of annoyance. 

“You had, not me. There’s a reason my brain doesn’t want to remember things and you’re pretending to be ignorant about it.” Ji-pyeong fired back after a few bites, too hungry to have this fight. 

“Well, then your reasons are shit because you don’t have another option besides facing the truth.”

“And what did you do after facing the truth of my feelings?” He retorted without waiting for a second, genuinely curious and aware that she would evade this conversation again. “Sure, I can’t remember, but would I even have forgotten it if things went well? I don’t think so.” 

“We’re not having this conversation now.” Dal-mi determined, focusing on her food as any resemblance of appetite went away. 

“You don’t get to decide things all the time, Seo Dal-mi.” Ji-pyeong announced, annoyed and angry by her childish posture. “You did it in the past and now look where we are.” He completed, fully ignoring how these words would hurt her. 

Despite knowing the accident was not her fault, it was Dal-mi’s silence in the past that got the best of Ji-pyeong. As the memories came back, so did this scorching pain everywhere in his chest, confirming how their story was nothing more than a knife in his heart. 

“Are you seriously saying this? Are you blaming me for your accident?” She asked, shocked and hurt once again by his take on everything. 

“Should I? Because I truly don’t know, as I don’t have memories from the last months.” Ji-pyeong kept going, releasing a wave of closeted anger his old self never got to set free “Maybe I’m only holding you responsible for your actions, someone had to do it eventually.”

Dal-mi's first response was to hit her hand openly on the table as if unleashing this wrath built up by their fight. Startling everyone around them, and Ji-pyeong as well, the woman stared at him, eyes lighted by hellfire. 

“Don’t you think I already do this to myself at every passing second, Ji-pyeong? Really?” She asked, a loud cutting tone leaving marks where it touched him. “Do you need someone to be this big villain? Fine, let me do it. Believe all you want that a person who is trying is evil incarnated all you want, but you better not regret it when you end up alone again in your cold apartment.” 

After piercing these words as needles on the man’s heart, Dal-mi simply got up and walked to the door. Opening up harshly, she looked at him one more time before getting ready to leave. 

“Find your own way to the apartment. I’m going to work and you better kill this shitty attitude by the time I’m home.” The woman demanded, leaving Ji-pyeong alone in a restaurant full of staring people. 

Seeing the noodles she had mixed in front of him, Ji-pyeong could only think how he would never eat this cursed meal again. 

**xx**

Another week passed since their fight. A blur of medical appointments, delayed work activities and adapting the apartment’s new environment. 

Ji-pyeong’s once cold house turned into a nest full of colorful pillows, and homemade meal’s scent lingering all day. Evidently, Haelmoni’s new mission was to turn his apartment into a real home, music playing in the morning and awkward moments together to watch dramas with her entering their daily schedule.

No matter how much he wanted to fight back and complain, Ji-pyeong simply couldn’t. For the first time in years, he felt loved and cared, at least as far as his memory allowed him to go while thinking about it. 

Things with Dal-mi were great, considering they barely saw each other and were unable to say sorry honestly. The fun bantering quickly elevated to constant fights Haelmoni always had to end, even during their meals together. 

Sure, she was present during his medical sessions. Only physically, because her mind couldn’t be more disconnected from him. Not even when he feigned a sudden pain did Dal-mi blink as if she was now trained in his shenanigans. 

Which was very annoying for Ji-pyeong.

Annoying such as her habit of walking around wearing only a robe after lengthy showers that would be the death of Ji-pyeong’s imaginative mind. Annoying like her cute awakening face every morning and how fast she fell asleep by his side during movie nights. 

Not that he was paying attention to her. Like, not at all. 

You see, Ji-pyeong was only a very observant man and sharing every inch of space with Dal-mi wasn’t helping but sharpening his skills. That’s why he could see the moments she stared profoundly and reflexively at him, mostly when the younger one thought he wasn’t looking. 

So when the nightmares began to hit him in a full force, Ji-pyeong also didn’t have to open his eyes to know she showed up at his side. Even when he screamed, cried and kicked in full force. 

Ji-pyeong couldn’t pinpoint exactly when did they start, but during his stay in the hospital, the nightmares were a brief thing. Maybe because he woke up with Dal-mi close to him, maybe because she kept reading him letters so he had at least a few peaceful nights. 

Even if it cost her sleep and huge bags appeared in her soft face in the morning. 

Sleeping in different rooms was the first and primal problem. Being completely alone in his gigantic room turned all the recent memories into fuel for dreadful nightmares. 

As Ji-pyeong advanced in the psychological sessions and began to remember more details, most of them related to Dal-mi, his brain decided to turn everything into awful dreams. 

For the most part, Ji-pyeong would dream about the accident. 

Sometimes it was him in the car and there was an unyielding horn playing over and over until his mind cracked. Other times, it was Dal-mi or Haelmoni, and Ji-pyeong could do nothing but watch as the whole thing happened in different scenarios. Since his stupid brain couldn’t remember the details, it decided to give him every damned option to dream with. 

He would usually be woken up by Dal-mi’s hand shaking his shoulders and calling his name repeatedly. Seeing her crying eyes every other night was challenging, but she was his anchor during these cursed nights. 

They would sleep together then, right there in his bed. Dal-mi would cocoon his body or simply hold his head by her heart and tell invented stories until he dozed off. 

Every morning, he woke up alone, her scent hanging everywhere just like pure air. 

Every morning, Ji-pyeong thought it was all a feverish dream, as things between them kept the same cold and distant rhythm. Dal-mi’s accidental looks to him were the only sign she actually cared and his exhausting nights were real. 

Soon, he chose to stop sleeping. Rediscovering Youngsil and his stupid answers to every question turned Ji-pyeong’s night into a daze of coffee and bad jokes. 

The doctors advised him not to do so, his psychiatrist even offered to order sleeping pills in the face of his resistance to deconstruct and overcome the nightmares, but Ji-pyeong wouldn’t accept anything. Even Dal-mi’s effort to scream with him about it daily was useless, and becoming sleep-deprived was the outcome of his choices. 

As Ji-pyeong’s brain was restless, the memories started to come back faster. Mixing reality with insomnia delusions, he kept seeing Dal-mi everywhere in his mind, even when the woman was away doing God’s know what. 

It felt like the world’s worst punishment, one he took greedily between late-night energizers and cups of coffee. 

And just like this, life found its way to work, despite the open injuries, broken hearts and torn memories lingering in every room. 

**xx**

Going back to work on a daily basis was a disguised blessing from the skies. 

Dal-mi couldn’t breathe freely in Ji-pyeong’s apartment, feeling suffocated by every step they took forward, and every step he took backwards. 

Watching him running in no sleep was making the woman mad. Coming home to a Ji-pyeong passed out on the couch became her routine, as well as cleaning the pile of energizing drinks cans spread around him, and getting rid of coffee’s sickening scent dawdling around the house. 

Even the doctor's best efforts and Joo-ri constantly complaining about how his poor choices were interfering with the treatment couldn’t change his mind. Dal-mi thought many times about drugging one of his thousands of coffee cups, but she felt bad with just one look at his face. 

Ji-pyeong now looked like the shell of a person. Eyes always far away from reality and body betraying his tiredness, the man couldn’t seem to focus on his meal and recently started to skip them. 

He looked like a candle about to go out, and all Dal-mi could do was watch. 

It wasn’t hard to see he was trying, in the worst way possible, to escape the nightmares. To escape the reality behind his memories coming back. 

For some reason, Dal-mi felt like he was remembering even more and decided to keep everything from her and the physiologic team, turning his recovery into an almost impossible work. Pleading for the doctors to not give up on him was a toll, so she felt tired whenever she got home.

In reality, Dal-mi was exhausted. 

Every so often, she would think about giving up on him and leaving for her old life. Watching a grown-up man thrashing his life was so frustrating that soon this became a challenge in her everyday life, making work and even her relationships a hard thing to manage. 

Apparently, Ji-pyeong had infiltrated himself in every aspect of Dal-mi’s life, as water does in free spaces. Knowing she allowed him in was even worse since this implied assuming she was responsible for a part of their current situation. However, this feeling was a constant reminder that leaving wasn’t an option because it meant leaving a part of herself all over again. 

So she worked. 

More so, overworked. 

Dal-mi turned extra hours into her working style, staying after the Chunmyung team had left, only to avoid coming back home and seeing Ji-pyeong again. Even Sa-ha and In-jae pleas went ignored. She simply had to focus on something else before freaking out. 

On a normal Tuesday, she woke up way earlier than needed and left home without eating Haelmoni’s delicious food. Knowing that Ji-pyeong was isolated in his balcony, probably staring at Han River for the tenth hour, the CEO decided to get to work in silence. 

Dal-mi’s day would usually start at Sandbox’s cafeteria, as she ate and answered yesterday’s messages and emails on her phone. After a quick bland breakfast that would never reach her grandmother’s level, the woman proceeded to use her empty office to revise reports or to work on important presentations. 

Getting the Smart City project approved was the easy part. Everything that came after was hell, especially because Dal-mi had delayed many demands by staying at the hospital with Ji-pyeong. 

As soon as her team entered the office, Dal-mi got up to work somewhere else or meet with In-jae. More than wishing for silence, she wanted to avoid Do-san and the heavy atmosphere around them. 

Dal-mi walked in the hallway searching for an empty meeting room, but before she could enter one, Do-san showed up suddenly. Positioning his hand on the door abruptly, the developer startled her in an uncomfortable way. 

“I’m sorry.” He said in a puppy voice, getting his hand back after seeing it was too much. 

“It’s okay, Do-san.” Dal-mi answered, trying to calm her heart rate and reunite the strength to stare at him. 

Knowing she was responsible for the constant pain in his expressions was hard, and yet, Dal-mi couldn’t face their conversation. Closure was a needed friend in their relationship, but assuming her mistakes and coming face to face with reality was too hard.

Harder than evading him for two months and a half. 

“Do you need something?” She asked, afraid of the answer but trying to build up the courage to end this once and for all. 

“Talk. I need to talk” Do-san said simply, searching her eyes for any trace of affection. 

“Okay, let me go first.” Dal-mi tried out. 

She tested the next words on her mind before saying, using the empty hallway as an opportunity to talk this through without interruptions. Furthermore, being in a public space meant things couldn’t turn ugly as well. 

“I’m sorry I’ve been avoiding you, it’s been really hard to get through the last weeks.” She explained, unable to fight the lame excuse.

“Yeah, it’s been really hard for me knowing you’re living under Han Ji-pyeong roof.” Do-san said, his tone suggesting she was a cheap person and not a helping one. 

“Do-san, there is no future for us beyond work colleagues and a healthy friendship.” Dal-mi announced, annoyed by his pettiness during times like these. 

“What? Are you choosing him, then?” He asked, outraged by her quickness to dismiss him.

“No, Do-san. I’m choosing myself for the first time and there’s no space for you in my heart now.” The woman said straightly, forcing Do-san to take steps back with the harshness of her blow on him. “Are you happy now? Is this what you wanted to hear?” She kept going, all anger and fire now. 

“What I wanted to hear is that you feel the same as I do.” Do-san fought back “I love you, Dal-mi. Still do despite your constant rejection and evasiveness, but all you can see is that forsaken man.”

It was the pain enthralled in his declaration that made Dal-mi hold her breath. Realizing she was responsible for his constant suffering, despite her request for him to move on, made things come into a different perspective. 

“Listen, Do-san.” She started, a softer tone and expression framing her face. “What we had wasn’t real and you need to understand this so we can work together. Back then, I fell for a lie and you created a distorted version of myself to love. We were not real back then and won’t be now.” 

“Dal-mi, how can you say this?” Do-san asked, speaking loudly and making his voice reverberate in the hall. 

“Do-san, I’m not your dream and joy.” Dal-mi spilled out, tired and hurt by his posture in this conversation. “Don’t you get it? People belong to themselves first and foremost and loving someone is not turning them into your whole world.”

“Dal-mi…” He tried, getting closer to her and even extending a hand to touch her. 

“I belong to myself, and you don’t get to own me.” She said, taking a step back and looking at him angrily

“How do you know what it is? You said you fell for a lie.”

“And now I’m trying to make you fall into reality. We’re over, Do-san. Please, move on and let our injuries heal so we can keep working together in the future.” Dal-mi explained in the same tone she used in the office “I’m thoroughly sorry for making you wait on me somehow and for the pain I caused, but please, let this go and let’s move on.”

“I can’t accept this, Dal-mi.” Do-san kept saying, coming even closer and making Dal-mi feel suddenly suffocated. 

“Do-san, please…” the woman asked again, closing her eyes out of exhaustion. 

Abruptly, Do-san's chest got pulled away from her personal space. Startled with the motion, Dal-mi opened her eyes to Ji-pyeong’s shining figure. 

Showing off a fresh haircut and dressed to the nines in a grey suit, the man held Do-san’s shoulders in place. Anger turned his sunken expressions into a spectrum of bright colors, making his old self come out after weeks.

“Are you deaf or something, dude?” He asked, rage painting red everywhere he looked. 

“What do you have to do with this?” Do-san fired back, forcing his shoulder away from the older man’s touch.

“So you keep treating your elders like this? Maybe you should punch me again and I can show you what amnesia made to my anger control, dumbass.” Ji-pyeong said with sarcasm dripping from his words like poison. 

Do-san’s shocked expression was worth remembering their awful relationship. In reality, Ji-pyeong wished he could take a picture, and frame the boy’s bewildered face right now. 

“Yes, asshole.” Ji-pyeong kept going, calling him every possible name as anger lingered in every thought and word. “Unfortunately I remember you and this awful attitude, so please get going before I have to hit my head on a wall until God blesses me with another amnesia.” 

Hearing his provocation made Do-san react instinctively. Grabbing Ji-pyeong’s collar, the developer raised his fist to take the bastard’s smile from his face and make this even. 

Before he could lash out on him, Dal-mi screamed and intervened. Holding Do-san’s raised arm in desperation, she began pleading for him to stop.

“Please, don’t.” Dal-mi said, again and again, distress darkening her pupils as she looked between them both. “Do-san, please go.” 

Seeing affection and concern in her face made all the strength go out from Do-san, as air deflating a balloon. Dal-mi had said with clear words she was choosing herself, which he ignorantly thought meant she hadn’t fallen for Ji-pyeong. 

However, once again, the younger man was completely wrong. 

“If you hurt her, if you even get closer to making her cry, I’ll find you and we’ll get even then.” Do-san threatened, face coming close to Ji-pyeong.

“Yeah, buddy.” Ji-pyeong answered once Do-san let him go, fixing his suit in the meantime “You should maybe say this to yourself in the mirror before trying to ravish pretty people over work.”

“Ji-pyeong!” Dal-mi intervened, catching the man’s wrist before he said something stupid “Let’s go. Right now.”.

Without looking back, Dal-mi knew he made a sarcastic salute move to Do-san before allowing her to drag him away from the hallway. They were done here. 

But she and Ji-pyeong were only getting started. 

**xx**

Dal-mi dragged him to a familiar space. 

As Ji-pyeong looked to the high walls of the dimly-lit hall they were, images of his past self holding a black jewelry box flashed through his mind. Remembering things got easier after the first sleepless weeks, his memories being the only company in his fight against the nightmares. 

For some reason, Ji-pyeong was sure this memory was related to Dal-mi. Probably, the warmness spreading like a blooming flower in his chest, as he remembered the moments in this place, was the most important sign.

He seemed to be quite good at remembering her now.

So good Ji-pyeong basically blocked out the woman’s screaming at him, focusing on her adorable angry face when she basically pinched his arm. Unable to hide a smile, the man’s dimples showed up, melting Dal-mi’s resolve and rage in an annoying speed. 

“Stop this right now. Stop smiling.” She demanded, hitting his arm over and over as Ji-pyeong laughed and tried to escape “We’re fighting. You’re prohibited from showing these dimples, Ji-pyeong.”

“Why, Ms. Seo, are you being seduced by then?” He asked, a flirtatious tone making Dal-mi jittery in a second “You actually are.” Ji-pyeong confirmed, laughing out loud as she groaned.

“We’re discussing something else here, buddy. Focus.” Dal-mi tried again, snapping her fingers until he looked at her. 

When Ji-pyeong focused on her, every curse word she wanted to scream at his face went away from her mind, as sand escaping through someone’s fingers. For the first time since the awful confrontation in front of the meeting room, Dal-mi saw how good he was looking. 

He had a beautiful fresh cut, stylized as he used in the past, forehead showing and a charming little wave at the tup. Also, the evocative expression in his face turned Ji-pyeong into an astonishing figure. 

As they stared at each other, it felt like they were back in the past, before the car accident and everything that came afterwards. 

Was he always this infuriatingly gorgeous? A smart smile always ready to come out, the dimples she absolutely adored right on point to make some woman’s heart flutter. 

To make Dal-mi’s heart flutter. 

“Are you distracted now?” Ji-pyeong whispered, making fun of her bedazzled expression “Do you want me to come closer? Maybe pose for you to take a picture?” He kept going, doing the same pose he did for the magazine in the past. 

“Shut up, you stupid man.” Dal-mi answered, swallowing her thoughts and hitting him again “What do you think you were doing back there?”

“Well, Ms. Seo, I was saving you from your horrible past choices, of course.” He answered simply as if him and Do-san weren’t about to roll down the hallway seconds ago. 

“Don’t do it ever again, and maybe consider being nice to people.” She tried to scold him, earning only an open laugh. 

“Are you serious now? That stupid boy playing adult was being invasive and disrespectful with you.” 

“I don't need a knight in shining armour. For your information, Ihad everything in control before you showed up being a dumbass with him.” Dal-mi fought back, feigning a confidence that had no place in their conversation.

“How am I the dumbass in this situation?” Ji-pyeong asked, dumbfounded by her audacity.

“Are you unable to be nice or something?” She replied, face inching closer to his as Dal-mi pretended to analyze him “Did the physiotherapy broke your manners?” 

“Not like your beloved ex broke my face once.” He said, making Dal-mi freeze in place as she remembered the episode “Two people can be mean, but I can be meaner, love.” Ji-pyeong fired after, coming closer to her face as well. 

“This mouth of yours is going to create impossible problems in the future, and I’ll be watching in the front row, Ji-pyeong.” Dal-mi spilled, the filter between her mind and words long gone now that angry and embarrassment ate her insides. 

“Will you be my saviour then, Ms. Seo?” He played, eyes travelling her gorgeous face with open interest. 

“Not at all, I’ll simply watch your mouth being your downfall.” She replied, licking her lips self consciously as Ji-pyeong dissected her existence with darkening pupils

“Then maybe we should do something about it.” Ji-pyeong pondered, a hand getting the hair on her shoulder away, exposing her slender neck to his famished being and forcing goosebumps to travel over Dal-mi’s body. “Maybe your mouth could be my downfall, my damnation.” He completed, fingers lingering over her jawline, eyes travelling leisurely from her mouth to the bright eyes staring back at his soul. 

“What?” She exclaimed, breathing in to fight his words a second before Ji-pyeong’s mouth came crashing on hers. 

Dal-mi felt her body being compelled down the cliff as soon as their lips touched, a battle of wills defining their first kiss. No emotion on Earth could describe how they kissed, only a blazing fire reaching high as they fought for control and surrender, intoxicating in each other’s taste as air became nothing but a memory. 

When Dal-mi melted to his touch, her beautiful body molding to his form, Ji-pyeong held her waist firmly, more strength than needed in the action. More than kissing her, he wanted to brand the woman’s entire existence, until she only remembered how it felt to be touched, to be worshipped by him. 

Pulling her closer and earning a delicious airless sound as an answer, Ji-pyeong took a hand to Dal-mi’s neck, this thing he wanted to ravish with lips and teeths until there was nothing but his scent on her. Drunk on the man’s existence, Dal-mi soon forgot she was in her workspace and walked back until the cold wall touched her inflamed body, making a luscious chill spread through her entire being. 

She could die feeling Ji-pyeong’s body pressuring hers. Every cell on her body seemed to be awake and anything he did, any small movement or muffled sound, reverberated inside her as if Dal-mi was nothing but an instrument of their shared desire and pent-up anger. 

Ji-pyeong’s fingers played with her exposed waist, diving even further on their kiss. Something about, finally, feeling Dal-mi surrendering to his touch while fighting for control made his senses alert, drinking her presence as the inebriated and infatuated person she had turned him into. 

When images of Dal-mi came at full force, Ji-pyeong became unable to divide reality and fantasy. 

Flashes from the moments he saw her from afar, and the golden opportunities they got to share together, walked through his mind as a film he could never lose again. Suddenly, Dal-mi became this shining protagonist of his forgotten memories. 

He started to remember. From the first time, Ji-pyeong saw her in Sandbox to the small moments such as when they hid behind her work table or built vegetable skewers late at night during Chuseok.

Ji-pyeong remembered it all. 

Backing away from their blazing kiss to breathe a gulp of air as his brain overloaded with information, Ji-pyeong tried to keep his control in check. Seeing his sudden reaction, Dal-mi got close and held his waist, trying to understand what had happened. 

“Ji-pyeong, are you okay?” She asked, ignoring the dishevelled state they were both in right now. 

“Dal-mi…” He said, holding the woman’s face in his hands in a haze “I remember you. I remember everything about you.” Ji-pyeong revealed, staring profoundly at her bright eyes as the memories completed their missing puzzle. 

**xx**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> COMING SOON ON CECIVERSE: a chapter 5 made over slowburn and a little smut as well 
> 
> which kiss scene was it better? this one or pofaf's? im curious for you guys reactions on this, cant waittt 
> 
> yall i litrally slept five hours today and worked my ass off since its 2021's first monday. i wrote this after my shift ended and grammarly decided to abandon me so im sorry for any mistakes made in this amazing chapter im thorougly excited to share with you guys. 
> 
> as always, hit your girl up on the comment section or over stan twt (@chancekai) using #ceciverse. im going to PASS OUT now but dont forget abt me okay? byeeeeee


	5. hard to resist temptation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys, first of all lemme say im sorry for the time it took to update this, and the crazy updating schedule too. my week is a whole mess as work and uni came back, so im still trying to manage my second life and order my activities as well 
> 
> im seriously thankful for everyone support, love and care towards me. you guys are the best friends i got to make online and i hope we get to be together in the future! thank you so much. 
> 
> with that being said: today i bring you not only a double update, but the conclusion of another jidal fic. ive been having too many ideas so i want to work on them after resting a little, but first we need to end this amazing thing i created with everyone's help. 
> 
> we won't be having notes at the end of this chapter because i dont want to interrupt the reading flow, so find me at the epilogue's ending note. lets goooo!

Dal-mi could explode into tiny love pieces as she listened to Ji-pyeong saying he remembered who she was. 

Heart racing and chest fluttering with relief and love, the woman positioned her own hand on his cheek as her brain processed what this meant for him. What it meant for them.

“You… you do?” Dal-mi asked, looking to his warm eyes as recognition colored Ji-pyeong’s irises with a rich coffee-colored tone. 

“God, fucking finally.” Ji-pyeong breathed out, diving in for another kiss that surprised her.

Being used to surprises like this one wouldn’t be a bad idea. Despite wanting to laugh at how his first reaction after remembering things was to kiss her, Dal-mi was thoroughly besotted and lost on Ji-pyeong’s lips moving leisurely over hers. 

More than kissing, he was leaving his mark on Dal-mi. One nothing on Earth could wash out. 

There was no way she would want to forget this, of course. Ji-pyeong movements were measured and controlled, as he was as a person, strong arms encircling the woman’s waist and a unyielding hand managing their kiss professionally. 

Sooner than expected, Dal-mi felt breathless and hot all over, as if her body had simply opened up to his touches and caresses. Sensing Ji-pyeong’s presence everywhere at once, an overwhelming wave of emotions turning her into a tight pile of ferocious desire almost drowned the CEO as the seconds turned into dust. 

“Okay, mister.” Dal-mi said, forcibly ending their kiss as she allowed air to come between them for the first time. “May I remember you that this is a very public workspace?” She questioned, earning a devilish grin as an answer. 

“And?” Ji-pyeong retorted, taking her lower lip between his sharp teeths in a provocation. 

“And we need to talk things through.” Dal-mi fought back, regaining her balance after a few seconds of astonishing silence. 

“I think kissing is much better, especially now that I’ll get to do it every time.” He tried again, face coming closer to hers.

“Stop right there, Mr. Han” the CEO ordered in her boss tone “Kissing you is good…”

“So you agree? Should we keep kissing?” Ji-pyeong joked, laughing at her sudden shyness.

“Focus here, mister.” Dal-mi tried again, hitting his chest funningly “Despite this being amazing and I wanting to repeat many times, I can see you trying to escape from the very needed conversations we still have to go through.” 

Listening to her supreme reasoning would never be funny. Dal-mi had easily seen it through his cheap, yet extremely luscious act, and Ji-pyeong’s only response was to rest his forehead on the woman’s soft neck. 

“So now you’re going to find your way to an appointment with the psychiatric to talk about the memories coming back. I will go back to work and later today we will talk about everything, okay?” she explained, holding his face endearingly to have him listening to everything. “Don’t worry, Mr. Han, you already made a number in me.” Dal-mi assumed, unafraid and unabashed after their affectionate exchanges.

“Is this an invitation for me to leave many more, Ms. Seo?” He asked playfully, seeing that there was no escaping her terms in this situation. 

“Yes, but now that you mentioned an invitation I want to ask you to be my plus one in Injae Company’s party tonight.” Dal-mi suggested, hugging his neck with her arms. 

“Are you asking me out, young lady?” Ji-pyeong questioned, feigning a surprised expression and earning a delicious open laugh as an answer. 

“Well, sir. Who would’ve thought? I actually am.” She answered simply, coming closer to initiate another kiss. 

Heavens, they would never get tired of this. Kissing each other was similar to diving in the world’s best high, an intoxicating and inebriating emotion erasing any detail around them.

When their lips touched, it was all about the textures, scents and low sounds they made. Only the air they shared, how close they could be from one another seemed to matter. It was always a heated symphony, an enthralling performance created by their own hands. 

How did they manage to survive almost two decades of knowing each other without sharing these precious seconds? 

How could they recover from this bewildering sensation now that they had tasted what life could be like?

When air turned into a required thing, they ended their kiss with small pecks and stood still in place, finding happiness in the freedom of looking at each other. Holding her close, Ji-pyeong's eyes kept mapping her expression as he used to do in the hospital, making sure to remember every little detail for when they were apart. 

Being looked at like she was something similar to a deity, or a blessing in someone’s life would always make Dal-mi feel special, but there was an exceptional thing about being observed by Ji-pyeong, and having the opportunity to look at him as well. Maybe it was the adoration coloring his irises in warm tones, maybe it was his affectionate hands taking every strand of hair from her face as he kept learning and relearning about the woman’s expressions. 

Despite all that, the love in his eyes seemed to feed Dal-mi’s soul, curing her broken parts and breaking down every possible fear about them. If only they could live in this moment forever. 

“Go on, now. I see what you’re doing.” Dal-mi said, taking a needed step back so she could escape his devouring atmosphere while talking. 

“Is it working?” Ji-pyeong asked, trying to fix his messy hair with a mischievous expression.

“Too much for our own good.” She retorted, laughing and coming closer to fix his tie. “You and I are going to have a serious conversation about not sleeping, and I’m banning coffee from the house.” 

“Yes, ma’am” He complied, knowing too well there was nothing able to fight the nature's force Dal-mi became when determined. 

“Are you going there on foot?” The woman questioned, accepting willingly his affectionate efforts to fix her dishevelled appearance. 

“Thankfully my pilgrim era is over, apparently buses and subways are okay for my brain. Despite being extremely uncomfortable.” Ji-pyeong announced, proud of his own development “I can’t wait to drive my car again.” 

“I promise that when you do, we’ll go on a road trip together.” Dal-mi said, raising on her toes to give him a quick peck “We have to be ready at 7pm, so don’t forget it.” 

“Are you making a joke with my amnesia now, Ms. Seo?” He asked, dumbfounded as she laughed loudly.

“Bye, Ji-pyeong.” she pointed out, giving him space to leave. 

“See you soon, I hope.” Ji-pyeong breathed out, knowing that there was no escaping. 

After stealing short kisses from Dal-mi’s velvety lips, the man left for his psychological session, trying to gather courage to face the new memories. 

Apparently, remembering was much harder than forgetting. 

**xx**

Being cornered by Sa-ha seemed to be Dal-mi’s new work activity. 

Before the CEO was even able to reach the office, getting ready to finally start the day, her best friend and designer came up to snatch her away by the hand. Pushing Dal-mi to an empty room, Sa-ha didn’t wait for another second before placing the woman in a chair, forcing her boss to focus on what she would say. 

“What is going on between you and Mr. Han?” Sa-ha asked, raising a hand as soon as Dal-mi opened her mouth “Don’t you even dream of lying to me right now, I’m at my limit from all this office stress.” 

“We are together… I think” Dal-mi answered honestly, testing the words for the first time. 

“What?” her friend asked, thoroughly shocked, and expecting a very different answer “So the fight I saw earlier was actually a two men’s conflict for a woman? Working here just turned into a fun ordeal.” 

“Were you sneaking around with Chul-san again? Seriously?” the other woman asked, bewildered by her team’s actions. 

“I’m not the one who has to explain myself here. Were they really fighting for a piece of you?” Sa-ha kept going, curious out of her mind. 

“No they weren’t, why would you even think that?”

“I mean… One look at your cheap clothes and bad taste in many things is an answer, but we don’t know how men’s brains work nowadays. Especially Mr. Han’s, who knows what happened to his poor mind after the accident, right?” the designer questioned, disregarding her boss as thoughts and words became the same thing.

“You’re the worst.” Dal-mi complained, rolling her eyes to the annoying woman trying to be all nosy again. “For your information, Ji-pyeong liked me in the past and he’ll continue to do so. We kissed a while ago and now I think we’re heading for a relationship, but it’s all fresh, so don’t freak out because I’m already doing this myself.” 

It was true, she was starting to freak out. Watching the man leave would always be a hardship, but something in Dal-mi told her that the future wasn’t going to be the same ever again, a feeling able to relax as much as stress her poor mind. 

Talking with Sa-ha and being confronted by her actions made things come into a different perspective. They kissed passionately, and Ji-pyeong remembered things about her and their past relationship. 

So what now? 

“Come back here, darling. We need your brain to work so don’t allow it to explode as you second-guess stuff all over.” Sa-ha requested, seating in front of Dal-mi so she could focus on their conversation and relax a little “Do you want this?”

“Yes. More than I could recognize.” Dal-mi answered right away, feeling relieved for taking this weight out of herself. 

“And are you sure, even underneath this breakdown you’re having, that you, Seo Dal-mi, is doing this for the right reason?” the designer kept going, caving for honest answers. “Don’t try to get the answer to this from your brain, do it from the stupid pulsing thing in your chest.”

Sa-ha’s question reached deep in Dal-mi’s heart. Placing a hand over her chest, the woman thought about how each answer would feel like. 

Saying no meant Dal-mi had, once again, acted without thinking. Using her pent-up anger and irritation with Ji-pyeong as an excuse to kiss him and understand her feelings better was not only a miserable idea, but also a disrespect for their history. Saying no meant she was rejecting him for the second time, paving the definite end of any relation they could have.

However, saying yes meant an entire future of uncertainty, an undiscovered path and an unexplored map that could take them anywhere. Being aware of this realization left an exciting and dreadful emotion lingering on every thought, every trying prediction Dal-mi wanted to create, just so she could prepare herself for any outcome. 

Despite the unyielding conflict living rent-free inside her, Dal-mi was certain of one thing: losing Ji-pyeong again was definitely not an option. Having shared weeks and precious seconds with him turned the man who once felt as a family into a safe space, a company she could always count on having. 

Even when they were apart, Dal-mi kept thinking about what he was doing, collecting moments to share with him, regardless of the constant fighting and tense state they were at home. Caring about Ji-pyeong became second nature, and this taught her how he felt in the past, supporting this emotion on his own and dealing with all the pain she caused by treating him badly. 

“I want to try this, Sa-ha.” Dal-mi answered honestly. 

And wasn’t trying the very root of love? 

Wasn’t love about trying repeatedly and daily, even with the hardship and challenges of sharing your heart with someone else? Even with the unknown things and the uncertain future? 

“So do it. You’re not the type of person to hold back once you decide for something, so go on and do your best, Dal-mi.” Sa-ha advised, smiling openly as her friend finally chose the one she was rooting for from the start. “And please let me know if things go wrong so I can prepare myself for the ongoing office drama.” she completed, using sarcasm to escape Dal-mi’s sudden affectionate expression. 

“Can’t you be nice for more than two seconds?” Dal-mi asked, laughing and leaving the chair. “To be honest, I hope you keep being mean to our competition.” she finished up, intertwining her own arm to Sa-ha’s as they went back to the office.

Their needed conversation would end up being a very long one, after all. 

**xx**

Ji-pyeong felt like his brain was the psychiatrist’s Rubix cube.

Hours in her office forced him to go through five types of exams, as well as an infinite question list and consuming tests to confirm his memories returning. What was planned to be a quick visit turned into a day-long treatment, forcing him to hurry home in a crowded bus before he lost the time to the party. 

It felt way easier when Ji-pyeong didn’t remember shit. At least back then, he got to take long naps after lunch, and wasn’t forced to be dissected by his crazy psychological team. However, being confronted by his memories and its meaning was an intense challenge. 

Remembering Dal-mi filled the puzzle about their story, memories of their first and last encounter before the accident coming back as vivid figures. It was truly a relief, especially because knowing more details of their past made Ji-pyeong feel like himself again. 

And yet, his brain couldn’t seem to unlock the door to the accident. 

Whenever the doctors tried to stimulate his fogged mind with different sounds, colors and images, Ji-pyeong felt his whole being shutting out, as an untuned radio. Apparently, his defense mechanisms were sharpened to an unreachable point, turning every effort into a waste of resources. 

His psychiatrist was sure that it would eventually come back, allowing Ji-pyeong to heal completely from the trauma. Having other memories returning to his mind was more than a positive sign, one they wanted to keep flowing despite the man’s resistance. 

Prohibited from sleepless nights and any resemblance of caffeine, Ji-pyeong went home with a dreadful feeling towards his nightmares. Escaping the restless nights turned his organism into a mess, but it was still better than waking up screaming at night. 

Determined to own his brain again, Ji-pyeong decided it was better to focus on the bright side, concentrating on the party he would be attending with Dal-mi. 

Dal-mi. Seo Dal-mi. Even thinking about her name made fire spread on Ji-pyeong’s solar plexus, a warm feeling reinforcing his infatuation for the young woman. 

If he closed his eyes and concentrated, Ji-pyeong could still sense her scent around him. 

Since the morning, Dal-mi was an unyielding presence hardening his day, and other body parts as well. Concentrating on the doctors was a challenge, as he kept remembering the taste of her lips, the texture of her fingers threading through his hair, the pleasurable little sound escaping her breathless being. 

She did taste as good as her vanilla scent, as Ji-pyeong once wondered back in the hospital room. After taking his first bite, the man only wished to drown on her existence. 

Reaching his apartment, he almost went up by taking the stairs, craving to see her already. Another bright side from the medical appointments was that Ji-pyeong came home when Dal-mi had already finished working, meaning they could enjoy some time together before going to the party. 

As soon as he entered home, the unique spicy aroma of homemade food embraced him. Walking towards the kitchen, Ji-pyeong found a dancing Dal-mi preparing something over the stove, singing out loud whatever cheesy pop song Yeongsil was playing around the house. 

With silent steps, he looked around to confirm Haelmoni wasn’t home before embracing Dal-mi from behind, dropping a wet kiss on her exposed neck. Ji-pyeong smiled in her hair, rejoicing in her surprise, and in the way she melted in his arms in the next second.

“What are you cooking, lady?” He asked, hugging her tightly to his chest. 

“Tteokbokki, because I know this is your favorite.” Dal-mi answered, resting her head on Ji-pyeong’s chest as the man made happy noises. “Here, I’ll let you try a little because we have to eat, and get ready for the party.” she explained, turning off the fire and snatching a wooden spoon for him to taste her recipe. 

Feeling altogether as a married man, Ji-pyeong took the offered food willingly, almost dying out of happiness when his senses registered the amazing taste of his soul food. Watching Dal-mi laugh when he tried to steal a little more turned this domestic moment into a special and intimate one. 

“So, how was the session?” Dal-mi asked, turning to him after slicing melon to eat while they still had time to talk.

Ji-pyeong sighed loudly, raising Dal-mi’s petite body to the counter so she could stay on the same eye level as him. Confining the woman between his two strong arms, each placed close to her thighs, Ji-pyeong feigned a thinking expression and stole the fruit she was holding, making sure to do it very slowly just to disturb her. 

“Well, it was awful and I never want to do this again.” He explained, trying not to laugh at Dal-mi’s surprise, having too much fun with their new intimacy. 

“Is the… Is the prognosis good?” Dal-mi tried to say, her mind miles away from this conversation as unheavenly scenarios took over every sense. 

“They say I need to keep stimulating my senses and I happen to know just the thing to do it.” Ji-pyeong answered, smiling devilish before killing the distance between their lips. 

Dal-mi was rapidly spiraling down as Ji-pyeong took control of her entire existence. using his soft lips and rough hands to do so. Kissing her with all the longing and accumulated desire for the time they have spent apart, the man overwhelmed the young CEO in the first two seconds of their exchange. 

His witted and swift fingers untied Dal-mi’s apron before she could blink, encircling her waist in the process and forcing their bodies to almost blend as one. Embracing Ji-pyeong’s strong torso with her own legs, she decided to complain later about his unrestrained manners in the middle of the kitchen, where Haelmoni could come up at any time. 

Reading her moves as an approval, Ji-pyeong didn’t waste another second before carrying Dal-mi’s light body towards the sofa. Without ever interrupting their heated kiss, the man laid her down with a kindness that didn’t suit the moment at all, but that still spoke levels about his affection and care. 

Once again, Dal-mi felt like the gates of heaven were open in front of her eyes when Ji-pyeong’s weight pressured her body. Privacy made everything more intense, his perfume entangling every skin patch over her body, turning into oxygen inside her lungs, his presence being in this all-consuming energy, firing the woman inside-out. 

As the demanding man he seemed to be during these moments, Ji-pyeong had a hand on her jaw, guiding the enthralling dance their tongues were having for control and surrender. His other hand seemed to be leisurely playing with Dal-mi’s shirt, raising the cloth until her velvety stomach was exposed to the chilled air of the apartment. 

Every kiss they shared seemed to be a rollercoaster of goosebumps, airless sounds and an unyielding fight for dominance. Whenever their lips touch, sparks and hellfire combust around them, similar to their constant bantering, but oh, so much better. 

Wanting to feel more of him, Dal-mi raised her hands to the man’s hair, tugging the strands with more violence than needed, but one Ji-pyeong thoroughly accepted. As if fueled by her motion, he lowered his lips and left a trail of blazing kisses in her neck, biting every available skin in a daze. 

Dal-mi’s body was arched and strained as a bow, obliged to his movements and actions. Feeling her heartbeats everywhere, the woman could do nothing but yield to Ji-pyeong’s force, this thing from nature turning her into a pile of emotions and unleashed desire. 

Annoyed by his own shirt, Ji-pyeong raised himself between the woman’s legs to throw the stupid fabric far away. Watching Dal-mi in such an unabashed state because of his actions was the world’s best gift. 

Her eyes were shining as the skies in a darkened night, pupils dilated by desire and lips reddened by their vigorous kisses. Dal-mi’s skin was flushed and marked from their exchanges, her beautiful hair a mess of tangles, after he threaded his fingers through it almost violently. 

With her blouse revealing the bottom part of a pinkish lace bra and an alluring smile on her face, the woman was the exact portrait of his doom, his ruination. 

Right now, he would give her everything she demanded. His soul, his name and his eternal love. 

And thinking about it only made him want for more. 

Dal-mi was having a blast from his ignition, drinking every slice of skin Ji-pyeong was showing, as the insatiable woman he was turning her into. Observing his every move and how his skin tensed in response was the utmost pleasure for the woman’s poor soul, her mouth watering as she wanted to do nothing but leave love marks everywhere. 

Raising her body once again, Dal-mi started to attain this wish until Ji-pyeong’s breathless sound took the best of him, making him initiate another passionate kiss. Before his hands found a way to undress Dal-mi’s shirt, Yeongsil voice spoke loudly in the entire apartment:

“It’s time to party.” the robotic voice kept repeating.

“It is indeed, now shut the fuck up man, you’re ruining it.” Ji-pyeong demanded in a harsh tone, making goosebumps travel through Dal-mi’s body as she observed his powerful figure closely. 

“Ji-pyeong…” Dal-mi began to say, being interrupted by his lips taking hers as the man felt she would say something mindless. 

Ji-pyeong hands retraced its way to Dal-mi’s exposed skin, playing with her waistband as his fingers travelled from her thighs to the blouse interrupting his party. When the man finally achieved his goal to take the shirt away, feeling as a kid unwrapping a birthday gift, Dal-mi said: 

“Han Ji-pyeong!” she exclaimed, biting his lips a little more stronger than necessary and actually winning a repressed moan as an answer, turning the whole situation into something even harder to do. 

“What?” He asked, annoyed by the second interruption.

“We have to go.” Dal-mi explained, using the worst words for this moment. 

“Can’t we have a party of our own here?” The man suggested, making a funny face that forced Dal-mi to laugh as she tried to sit on the sofa. 

“Look, as much as I love this little show we’re having, which I’m really into, by the way” she began to say, coming closer to his exposed chest and kissing it while saying every word “We’re already late to get ready for the party.” 

“Did you and Yeongsil set me up? I’m really going to kill this machine.” Ji-pyeong asked, sending a cutting stare to the said device. 

“I set him to announce when the time to leave came, stupid.” Dal-mi answered, laughing and slapping his chest as well “Don’t worry, we will get to continue where we stop it…” 

“Fuck yes” the man celebrated, interrupting her speech. 

“After we talk things through” she finished, smiling as his happy face turned into a cute pout, and kissing it before getting ready to take a bath. “You can’t sit on the couch and complain, go get deliciously ready for me, and we might have an after-party.” Dal-mi explained, disappearing on the hallway to her room and leaving Ji-pyeong with many ideas on his mind. 

They got ready in a record time, Ji-pyeong jumping into a tuxedo after losing a few minutes fantasizing with inappropriate scenarios involving a very smashed Yeongsil, and little clothes as well.

Eating a second bowl of tteokbokki while Dal-mi got ready, he had completely given up on fixing his bow tie and decided to consume the spicy delicacy until it was time to leave. Concerned by the ticking clock and the profound silence around the house, Ji-pyeong dropped the dishes in the dishwasher and went to her room. 

Opening the door after knocking twice, the man lost his voice and every word as soon as he registered Dal-mi’s astonishing figure. She stood tall in front of the body-length mirror, using a long pinkish dress opened in the back, the evasé skirt touching the ground as petals embracing her gorgeous frame. 

Dal-mi’s neck was exposed as her hair was styled to one side, making him feel restless, a craving desire to hold her taking place as well. Ji-pyeong was, once again, dazzled by her existence and beauty. 

Watching the stunned expression in Ji-pyeong’s face through the mirror made Dal-mi laugh as she closed an earring in place. Smiling affectionately to him, chest warmed by the adoration lighting his eyes, she requested in a sultry tone:

“Can you zip it up for me?” 

Ji-pyeong was behind her in a second, eager to touch her, to feel her velvety skin against his. Looking at Dal-mi’s reflection on the mirror, he slowly took his warm hand to the nape of her neck, causing goosebumps to spread everywhere he touched. 

Pleased to see her body reacting to his touches and commands instantaneously, the man proceeded to close her dress ever so slowly. Making sure the enticing outfit was covering the woman’s beautiful skin properly, Ji-pyeong came closer and kissed the sensitive spot behind her ear, where a long earring stood beautifully. 

“You look astonishing, Dal-mi.” He whispered in her ear, an arm embracing her from the back as Ji-pyeong stared at their perfect image in the mirror. 

“You don’t look too bad yourself, but I think this tuxedo comes with a bow tie.” Dal-mi observed, seeing the fabric resting lazily at his shoulders. 

“I was never good with this damned thing, can you please fix it so we can leave before I decide to tie you in my bed with it?” Ji-pyeong requested in a breath, relishing in the image of Dal-mi’s pupils darkening as a response. 

She turned to him and did her best to create a perfect bow tie, breathing his scent and enjoying every second of their proximity. Finishing up, Dal-mi proceeded to fix his suit and give him a quick peck, before the man got ideas and decided to delay them even more. 

“Ready to go?” she asked, offering him a hand after picking up her small bag.

“I can’t wait to come home, love.” He simply answered, taking the offered hand and kissing it passionately. 

**xx**

As expected, In-jae went over many limits to execute her company’s first party. 

Dal-mi and Ji-pyeong felt like guests on an award’s red carpet, taking pictures and answering journalists through the first hour since their arrival. Because the man was prohibited from drinking alcohol until the doctors allowed so, he got to chaperone his plus one, who had picked up a champagne of flute as soon as the flashes became too much. 

Despite the formalities and responsibilities of being there with Chunmyung Company’s CEO, Ji-pyeong was having fun. He kept entertaining Dal-mi with gossip about the big figures participating in the party, as well as telling bad jokes so she could distract herself from any pressure. 

Some journalists recognized him and asked about the accident, what had happened and how he was acting as SH Venture Capital’s Director now. Feeling uncomfortable, Ji-pyeong would sometimes escape the subject, or allow Dal-mi to give the same nonchalant answer about his recovery and treatment coming first. 

Whenever someone asked them if they were a couple, Dal-mi would freeze for a few seconds and Ji-pyeong had to jump in to say yes for her. Enjoying the panicked look and affectionate smiling fighting to take place on the woman’s face, the investor proceeded to act as her companion during the night. 

At some point of the event, they went separate ways as Dal-mi and Sa-ha went to talk with potential investors and Ji-pyeong found Ms. Yoon in the crowd. Appreciating the opportunity to have a meaningful conversation and not the usual chitchat, he kept talking about his treatment and about work with his boss until she decided to go home. 

Standing near the bar, body resting on the balcony as he waited for the bartender to bring him a club soda, Ji-pyeong almost didn’t recognize a fancy Do-san stopping by his side. Breathing twice before interacting with the well-dressed developer, he tried to start a short conversation, but was interrupted by him:

“So you guys are together? Couldn’t wait for the body to get cold, huh.” Do-san pointed out sarcastically, the smell of alcohol leaving him, signalling that he was probably starting his third beer during a professional event. 

“Can you not embarrass yourself right now, and drink some water without talking to me?” Ji-pyeong asked honestly, feeling a headache spreading from the center of his forehead just by listening this stupid person. 

“Nah, mate.” Do-san declined in a dragged tone, ridiculously hiccuping at the end like the weak person for alcohol that he was. “I’m already embarrassing myself from working with the woman I still love, and by talking with her douchey new boyfriend.” He kept going, making Ji-pyeong’s hand tingle with the desire to shut his mouth. 

“Well, it has been three years since you and Dal-mi got nothing but your hopeless dreams. So I hope you quit very soon,  _ mate _ .” Ji-pyeong answered sarcastically, smiling as he took his club soda and prepared to go away. 

“Don’t you think you should back away and allow us to be happy?” Do-san asked, slightly louder, attracting strangers attention around them. 

He was really asking for a good punch in his face, seriously. Ji-pyeong tried to breathe, and follow his doctor tips to keep it together, but listening to the lame developer talking about Dal-mi as if she was his plaything was getting on the older man's nerves very quickly. 

“If I were you, I’d stop talking right now.” Ji-pyeong managed to say, talking between gritted teeths. 

“If I were you, I’d have Dal-mi and things would be just fine” he retorted, extending the vowels in his last word. “But then I wouldn’t have my memories and that must suck.” Do-san completed, laughing out loud and hitting Ji-pyeong’s arm, making his drink spill all over his very cleaned and very dry tuxedo. 

“Are you kidding me?” Ji-pyeong yelled, startling Do-san and everyone around him “Back the fuck away before I do it for you.” He said, holding the man by his collar and bringing his drunk face closer so he would get it. 

“Ji-pyeong!” Dal-mi’s voice called out from somewhere behind him. 

“Good, I’m glad someone is here to take this child away.” He celebrated, releasing Do-san and looking at the angry woman staring daggers at them. 

“Out. Now” she simply said, pointing to an outside space closer to where they were. 

However, her eyes were focused on Ji-pyeong, not on the drunk developer harassing him. 

“Are you seriously scolding me?” he asked, dumbfounded and fueled by her protectiveness towards Do-san.

“Ji-pyeong, right now.” Dal-mi repeteaded, a pleading look making Ji-pyeong close his mouth and leave with angry steps.

Once outside, Dal-mi closed the door to give them some privacy. Following In-jae’s orders, she proceeded to discuss what had happened with Ji-pyeong. 

“Were you really about to make a scene at a work party that it’s important to me?” she questioned, not leaving a second for him to defend himself.

“He was the one coming up at me and saying asshole things about you.” Ji-pyeong fired back, trying to show his perspective and the facts.

“It doesn’t matter who started it, thankfully I stopped before you embarrassed yourself and dragged me down as well.” Dal-mi said, annoyed and frustrated by his childish attitude “I can’t believe you are acting out now. We were in such a good space, Ji-pyeong.” 

“Were? As in we're not anymore? Because of him, your dumbass ex-boyfriend with the world’s worst emotional control?” he questioned, feeling outraged by how she was coming at him “Can you listen to what you’re saying? You keep postponing our relationship because of a heavenly conversation that never seems to happen and now you have the courage to defend him?” 

There it was, the old Ji-pyeong with his mean words and sarcastic demeanor, always bringing Dal-mi down and hurting her feelings. She couldn’t even say she wasn’t expecting, having wasted precious minutes while getting ready just to overthink stuff, preparing herself for when he acted out in this jerk attitude. 

Because she knew he would do it. Dal-mi was sure Ji-pyeong would disappoint her soon, destroying the amazing atmosphere they had created and showing that she couldn’t trust her own feelings until he got better from the accident’s aftermath. 

It wasn’t as if she was waiting for it, truly. At least she didn’t think so, having fed her heart with hope and expectations towards their fresh start. 

Only to be disappointed another time. 

“It took you long enough to show your claws.” Dal-mi said, tears gathering in her eyes.

“What?” Ji-pyeong asked, feeling left out from something important he should know at this moment.

“Couldn’t you at least refrain yourself from acting like a jerk in a public space? This was important for me, Ji-pyeong, and you ruined by lashing out on Dosanni…” she started to say, stopping short once she realized what had come out.

“ _ Dosannie _ ? Really?” he questioned in a loud tone, startling the embarrassed woman as anger turned into a fiery pit inside his heart “I’m always surprised about how clueless you can be, Seo Dal-mi. But then again, what to expect from a person who kept me and him cooking for more than three years only to decide nothing at the end?” Ji-pyeong fired out, intending to hurt her as she did with him.

“Don’t say this. Please.” Dal-mi requested in a slow voice, tears falling down now. 

“Why Dal-mi? You wanted to talk, so let’s talk.” Ji-pyeong said loudly, disappointed and sad with this whole situation “In fact, let me go first. Everything I ever did, from writing the letters in the past to helping you hide when you were crying in the office, was thought of as an act of care and love for you. Always, even when you chose to ignore me and keep me waiting for a simple answer, even if it was a no.” he started, pouring his heart down at her feet by bringing issues they never discussed in the past.

“Even after finding out the truth, you kept me waiting and waiting, still holding feelings towards a lie and a boy incapable of loving himself, imagine loving someone else. As a good person, your friend and aid during hard times, I stood by your side until giving up was the only option.” Ji-pyeong affirmed, making gestures to prove his point. 

“What?” the woman asked, not knowing what he meant at all.

“Do you want to know what everyone keeps telling me? Before the accident, I was at Do-san’s house trying to make him give up on you, only to end up retreating from this fight as I realized you would always choose the actual Do-san. Not me, not the one from the letters, not the letters itself.” Ji-pyeong explained, exposing something he had never shared before “And do you know what they told me in the hospital? My said wife went to my office bringing iced coffee to ask for advice. Fucking advice, Dal-mi, as if I was just some stupid mentor, only your blooding sandbox, not a person and never a man.” he revealed, speaking louder by the second. 

“Don’t you think I know I messed up, Ji-pyeong?” Dal-mi fought back, tired of being in this victimized spot that didn’t suit her at all “I went there with a lame excuse, but at least I went after you when all you did was stay in the shadows. You wanted a miracle, and I couldn’t offer one as I was seeking for some heavenly blessing to understand my own feelings.” 

“Did you ever leave me space in your life beside the shadows? Yeah, I don’t think so.” Ji-pyeong pointed out, angry with her poor attitude “I took what you gave me time and again, and I feel like I’m doing this right now. Maybe we shouldn’t have started this as you are still attached to your dear Do-san.” 

His words hit deeply on her heart, making it bleed and wither. Watching Ji-pyeong’s heated eyes and the pain in his irises made Dal-mi remember the time she stood as his aid in the hospital, always finding a way out from their fights and conflicts. 

Maybe she had to do it one last time to salvage this.To salvage them. 

“We will finish this conversation at home.” Dal-mi determined, trying to reach him without letting her pride be even more injured.

“We won’t.” Ji-pyeong cutted in, looking at her with a hurt expression. “I won’t be coming home tonight.” he completed before turning his back and leaving towards anywhere but this doomed party. 

Leaving a crying Seo Dal-mi behind, the man only walked and walked for long minutes. Going nowhere and trying his best not to drown on the pain shattering his heart again, Ji-pyeong attempted to find a place where he could have peace.

But Dal-mi was everywhere, attached to his favorite spots and even to his own house. She had invaded, or rather, been invited to the man’s entire life, filling the blank spaces and darkened ones with her colorful existence. 

Realizing how fucked up he was, Ji-pyeong decided to keep walking until his legs gave out and the sun lightened his obscure mind state. His steps took him to an avenue, cars and pedestrians making such loud noises the man couldn’t even listen to his own thoughts. 

Feeling disturbed by the excessive noises and lights coming his way, Ji-pyeong staggered where some people were crossing the street, trying to reach a silent park nearby. Following everyone's rhythms without really seeing anything, as his mind seemed to be overloaded with information, he managed to take some steps before a familiar sound came crashing down. 

A loud noise. 

A long and repetitive noise coming somewhere close to him. 

Thinking about it in an effort to get rid of the disturbing emotion controlling his body, Ji-pyeong tried to associate the sound with a memory. 

It was a horn. A truck’s horn announcing his proximity to other drivers. 

And suddenly, Ji-pyeong wasn’t standing on the busy avenue. He was driving his convertible, during a rainy night in an idle runaway, day turning into afternoon outside the foggy windows. 

He could clearly listen to a truck’s loud horn announcing a risky overtaking right ahead, invading his lane as Ji-pyeong tried to sped through this situation. Before his brain could recede to reality, the man felt the steering wheel escaping as he tried to drive towards the coasting, getting hit in the next second by the hurried truck. 

Images from the accident mixed with the busy traffic around him, people making loud noises for him to move away from the avenue. A green light shone brightly in one of his sides, cars honking and screaming voices trying to unfreeze the strange man standing still in the middle of the street. 

Before he could take another step, Ji-pyeong felt his brain collapsing and his body falling down as a ventriloquist doll without its master. 

Once again, there was only darkness. 

Everywhere.

**xx**

Waking up with Dal-mi hugged to his side could very easily turn into his routine, but opening his eyes in a hospital room would always be a nightmare. 

Having the same hungover feeling over his body, Ji-pyeong freaked when his brain processed that he could have lost another month again, being caged in this bed and the horrid stainless white walls around him. 

Before he could react harshly, Dal-mi’s vanilla scent was registered by his senses, acting as a tranquilizer reaching the man’s blood. Breathing in and out, as the psychiatrist had teached him in the past, Ji-pyeong calmed his heartbeats, trying and failing not to wake the sleeping beauty attached to him. 

Dal-mi opened her eyes leisurely, yawning as the sleep fog went away, leaving space for her sight to register a very observing Ji-pyeong staring right at her. 

“Hey, handsome.” she answered with a small smile, nesting her body on his side.

“This was not what I meant with an after-party.” Ji-pyeong whispered, looking around and making the woman laugh as an answer. 

“How are you feeling? The doctor said you had a panic episode and fainted, probably because…”

“The accident’s memories coming back? Yes, you’re absolutely right.” he confirmed, allowing Dal-mi to help him sit comfortably. 

“How do you feel now?” she asked, sitting by his side and holding his hand affectionately. 

“Did I lose another month in this bed?”

“Not at all, they only gave you tranquilizers so you could have a proper night of sleep after spending weeks fueled by coffee and energizers.” Dal-mi explained, annoyance in her tone indicating she still hadn’t forgiven him. “I almost asked them to give me some since you, once again, almost made me have a damned heart attack.” 

“And how is Haelmoni? How are you?”

“We’re fine because Joo-ri was with us in every step. She calmed our hearts by explaining this was a normal reaction and everything would be fine.” she answered, truly grateful for the nurse “Haelmoni is waiting for us at home, the doctors will release you after a quick check-up. She already knows about us, having seen my distressed state, and apparently she’s more than okay with our relationship”

“Thank God. So, yeah, I’m okay, grateful for remembering things, but not for this headache.” Ji-pyeong explained, feigning a pained expression that won him nothing but an annoyed expression as an answer. 

“Yeah, mate, this won’t work at all.” she said, laughing at his dull efforts and happy because he was already looking like himself “Look Ji-pyeong… I’m sorry for what I said during our fight yesterday. Sa-ha explained the whole misunderstanding and I realized how wrong I was right when someone called from the hospital.” Dal-mi announced honestly, putting out the words she felt heavying her chest. 

“It’s okay, love. We had to get some stuff out of our system in order to move on.” Ji-pyeong explained, feeling more reasonable now that the anger went away and his memories came back. 

“What you said made me think about my mistakes in the past and right now, all I want to do is make it right for us.” she explained, lighter by saying these words to him.

“Me too, seriously. Now that we overcame the ugly part, we can talk things when it's fitted and take everything on a new rhythm.” he affirmed, kissing her hands lovingly. 

"Seeing you attached to a hospital bed again made me realize I never told you this." Dal-mi began to say, holding his face on her hands so the man would pay attention to every word "I want to be with, and only you. You're my past and present, and there's no one else I'd like to share my future with but you, Han Ji-pyeong." she revealed, opening her heart to him for the first time in too long.

"Would you care to repeat so I can record it and turn this into my ringtone forever?" Ji-pyeong requested earnestly, making Dal-mi laugh openly and kissing her forehead as well "There's no better plan in this world than being yours, Seo Dal-mi." he said honestly, happy that they were now on the same page.

“Can you promise me there won’t be hospital rooms in our future?” she requested, resting her body to his side again, staring the man’s warm eyes as they talked, 

“Only when you get really mad at me and decide to throw sharp objects, or when we start having a little troop of kids.” Ji-pyeong answered honestly, making a reflective expression while saying the words that warmed her heart.

Right there and then, with Ji-pyeong dressed in another horrid hospital outfit, looking a little tired and dehydrated as well, Dal-mi realized she loved him. 

Realized because it was never a choice, rather an instinctive reaction of a heart so used to his own. Realized because there wasn’t another path for them in the future, only a long road to happiness and togetherness. 

“Are you ready to do this? To really try this?” Dal-mi asked, wanting to understand his feelings. 

Offering her a bright smile and taking the woman’s hand between his own, Ji-pyeong answered happily:

“Only if you’re leading the way, dear.” 

When they kissed, it felt more like signing a deal than just a love gesture. Finally, they were ready to walk the same road, exploring life’s map together as one. 

Sharing this adventure with one another meant finding friendship, care and understanding. It meant doing love’s best thing: trying. 

Trying daily, side by side. 


	6. all the roads you took came back to me

On their first road trip together, Ji-pyeong went crazy preparing even the smallest details.

As he was certain now that sailing off without a map was an absolutely stupid thing, the man made sure to prepare everything in advance. Which meant he made Dal-mi and Haelmoni mad by starting his plans five days earlier than the scheduled date for their trip.

The original purpose of travelling around was to take a time off and away from Seul, as a way to rest their troubled minds after everything that happened. Since Ms. Yoon had agreed to allow Ji-pyeong to take his first extended vacation and In-jae basically forced her sister to go, they had three job-free weeks to enjoy.

When Ji-pyeong decided to fulfil his promise and suggested they would make a road trip to Korea's hidden spots, offering to organize everything as long as Dal-mi drove, she couldn’t deny. Watching him overcome his trauma little by little would always make her heart flutter with pride and admiration.

He never failed to surprise his now-girlfriend and every day felt like an adventure.

Inviting Haelmoni was a desire and a need, as the man couldn’t seem to survive without her meals anymore. Since her latest exams showed good news on the treatment she started to do, the older woman was more than available to travel with her kids, a couple she absolutely adored and rooted for.

Their exploration was a route of cheap hostels and rented Airbnb’s rooms, as Ji-pyeong and Dal-mi decided to opt for good prices and comfort. Living together with her and Haelmoni taught him valuable lessons about what was important in life, and sleeping closer to Dal-mi in a tight bedroom was a bonus he would never waste.

During late nights, Dal-mi would allow him to read her journal, an old notebook where she wrote down business ideas. As a gift from her father during one birthday, she had taken good care and hidden her written words from everyone, only allowing her boyfriend to read and help perfect any epiphanies she had during restless nights.

They would enjoy every minute on the road to talk about life. From politics to personal experiences they never shared, the trio discussed everything available, even playing stupid games when Ji-pyeong yielded to Dal-mi’s effort.

Going to bed by his side and waking up with Ji-pyeong’s arm holding her close was Dal-mi’s new favorite thing. She got used to his presence everywhere earlier than their relationship intimacy, rejoicing in any opportunity to be by his side since she could do it now.

Discovering secret paradises around their country felt exactly as their relationship. Every day was a new lesson, a collection of precious moments, heartfelt laughter, stolen kisses in any available spot and meaningful conversations about their feelings.

Overcoming their fears and insecurity from past conflicts allowed them to see each other with fresh eyes. Becoming an admirer, a faithful friend and a forever companion for one another was inevitable, as they began to understand how their past, present and future was entangled since the first letter left in a worn bird box during a spring afternoon.

Sharing priceless moments with Dal-mi and Haelmoni gave Ji-pyeong an unique sense of family and duty. Feeling responsible for the women's safety and happiness while simultaneously being looked after, despite being released from the medical team months ago, helped them find in each other a very unrestricted aid, one they needed and appreciated a lot.

Once again, life found its rhythm. This time, the Goddess of Fate allowed them to have love-filled days and not a happy ending, but a happy continuance, a constant maintenance of their relationships and themselves.

Together, not only did they get better, but got to be who they should be, the best version allowed. As individuals, a loving family and a merry couple, Ji-pyeong and Dal-mi learned that sometimes destiny, or our map in life as some might say, takes us towards diverging paths and dangerous roads.

However, when the Sun gives space for the Moon, and we recollect ourselves with our loved ones, life always finds a way to walk us through valuable lessons.

Ultimately, our journey on Earth is always about the journey, the process and our walk through every day, since our destination is set by nature’s law, but not written in stone.

Life is a book being written daily by us all, a love letter in the making. We write our lines with blood, sweat and tears, but with happiness, love and meaningful connections as well.

In the end, the most important question is not what comes next and what will happen once we leave this world, but rather, what is the story we’re leaving behind us.

Make sure to write good ones.

_ the end  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALEXA PLAY MAPS BY MAROON 5
> 
> oh my god! my second story! is done! and published!
> 
> i'm so happy to share this journey with every reader and follower, seriously. you guys are amazing human beings and i feel honoured to be your fic writer, thank you so much for trusting my work and liking it so much.
> 
> as you may know by now, i'm a regular journalism student, working all day in a crazy industry and fighting my way through college. ive been a reader my whole life and a secret writer as well, pofaf was my first english written work, since im brazilian and portuguese is my first language, and this is my second one.
> 
> sometimes, i feel stupid writing fanfics about a couple that didn't work because of phr damned poor writing, doing this after my shift and during late nights. however, every person who read my stories and talk to me through the comment section, and over stan twt, makes me feel special and loved. once again, thank you so much for encouraging me to write and do what i love.
> 
> i want to thank mali (@jakcsowang) and julia (@judefavari) for helping me bring this story to the world, these human beings are exceptional people who believe in my crazy ideas and survive my writing schedule, so thanks girls, i truly love yall. also, kudos to the amazing cia (@therapbasquiat) for making an astonishing cover art as well.
> 
> as always, hit me up on the comment section and over stan twt (@chancekai) using #ceciverse for reactions and goodbyes.
> 
> cant wait to create something new with our favourite couple. love you guys and i see you then 💛

**Author's Note:**

> did yall miss my cliffhangers? i most certainly did hehe
> 
> last fic's first chapter i k worded haelmoni and now im messing up with jipyeong, wonder who comes next 🤔 (KIDDING, THIS IS A JOKE LOWER YOUR WEAPONS) 
> 
> as always, hit me up on the comment section or over stan twt (@chancekai) and use #ceciverse for reactions so we can interact even more <3


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